Worst Jokes Ever
They say that the tongue is the strongest muscle in the human body. Wanna fight? 👅💦
Are you a pirate? Because I have a lot of seamen waiting for you 😉
Let's play carpenter. First, we'll get hammered, then I'll nail you.
My attitude doesn't have to be the only reason I yell and roll my eyes in the back of my head.
How do you make a snooker table laugh? Tickle its balls!
Are you a haunted house? Because I’m going to scream when I’m in you! 😫
What's the difference between a good joke and a bad joke? Timing.
What do you call fake spaghetti?
An impasta.
Why are the UK and the USA bad at playing chess?
Because they lost 2 towers and their queen.
My girlfriend really wants me to get her pregnant so she would have a father figure in her life for once.
Why don’t coffins have Wi-Fi?
Because they don’t want people to be so ‘connected’ while they’re trying to rest in peace.
What do you call a midget stripper?
A pocket pussy.
There was a kid crying. I asked him where his parents were. He cried more. I love working at an orphanage.
What do you call a Lesbian at a Barbecue? A LGBBQ.
Is it OK to tell a Covid patient to stay positive?
What do you call it when a gorilla bumps uglies with an orangutan?
Monkeypox.
How do you throw a surprise party at the hospital?
Throw a strobe light in the epileptic ward.
My 19-year-old girl killed a butterfly. I said no butter for you.
She then she killed a cockroach. I told her nice try.
I was in the corner shop to buy some lottery tickets, and the Indian woman was sporting a red dot on her forehead. I scratched it off and won a fucking Ford Focus!
What did Chris Brown say the first time he saw Rihanna?
I’d hit that.