Worst Jokes Ever

What's the difference between a snow woman and snow man?

Snowballs.

Why was Timmy sad? Because his dad stapled a frog to his forehead.

What's worse than one dead baby in a trash can?

One dead baby in ten trash cans.

9/11 happened... right?

The cops respond to 9-1-1... coincidence, I think not.

What's the difference between the Grand Canyon and a blonde?

The Grand Canyon is a busy ditch.

So, I got my blind friend a Big Mac for his birthday. A week later, he walked up to me and said,

"Damn, that was the most violent book I've ever read."

When you see your friend, you call the police, but they just moan.

I went home one day. My mom said, "Look what a few guys got me." It was a MILF trophy.

My mom asked what does that mean. So I said, "Mom's I'd Like To Fuck." Then my mom said, "These guys want to fuck me?" I said, "Yeah." Then my mom said, "I still got it!"

If anyone's gonna be fuckin' my sister, it's gonna be ME!

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how many you throw.

My name is Mike Oxmaul, and my friend's name is Hugh Janus!

I still remember my granddad's last words,

"Are you still holding the ladder?"

One night my brother asked me, "Am I a pro gamer?" I said, "No, you're not a Pro-grammer."

What’s the difference between Burger King and Ron Jeremy?

BK doesn’t sell real meat.

What’s a lesbian’s favorite sport? Dodge balls.

What do you call a creepy IT teacher?

A PDF file.

At night, before I got in bed with my girl, I had 206 bones, but I developed a 207th bone.

My penis is tied in a knot.

How do you get a baby into a small bowl?

A blender.

How do you get it out? Tostito chips.

A kid named Billy gets his lunch money stolen at school. The bully later gets his allowance, the lunch money, and his wallet taken by his father.

The father then gets all the money taken from him by the bully’s grandfather along with his own wallet. The grandfather then takes the money and gets it stolen by Billy along with his own wallet.