Worst Jokes Ever

Where's the best place to spawn camp at the hospital?

The maternity ward.

Fail and fall mean the same thing when it’s downstairs.

Your mom's like a candy machine; she pops out for anybody.

When you realize the person reading this is a clown.

You like to draw? Because I like the MD, raw :)

I was talking to a Muslim yesterday, and he asked me what it's like to be blind.

I happened to tell him about 20 jokes; in fact, I was working on my twentieth. So I answered with, "At least I don't have to screw in light bulbs. It's not like I need the damn things anyway."

Friend, your mum's fat.

Me: Well, your mum's so fat, she played pool with the planets.

Um... (no idea what joke I should tell).

Why did the chicken cross the road to get to the other side?

Q: What’s the hardest thing about fucking a dude with a dildo?

A: Making sure he doesn’t wake up.

Bully: "You are so stupid!"

Classmate: does nothing.

Bully: "Oi, I'm talking to you!"

Classmate: "Oh, you're talking to me? I thought you were talking to yourself."

You can't be a loser if you have nothing to lose.

What's the difference between Princess Diana and Thomas the Tank Engine?

Thomas came out the other end of the tunnel.

A kid gets home from school and finds his mom and dad having sex. The kid asks, "What are you doing, Dad?" The dad replies, "Having sex with your mom, son," and he starts laughing.

The next day, Dad gets home from work and finds his son having sex with his nan. The dad shouts, "What the hell are you doing, son?" The kid replies, "It's not funny when it's your mom, is it?"

Why did ItsFunneh go on the road? She so Draco looking at a car then the car runs over him, sad Draco.

Yo mama so poor, she chased a garbage truck with a shopping list.

How many kids does it take to change a light bulb? Well, it's not 53, 'cause my basement's still dark.

What's the difference between my basement and my garage?

One has a pile of babies' bodies; the other has their heads.

Why couldn't the skeleton go to the dance?

Because he had no BODY to go with.

Y’all can actually see them at all, my toe.