Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

Technically, suicide is murder, and murder is illegal, so if I kill myself, my body should go to jail.

Mom: Anna, let your younger brother have the sled one half of the time, and you the other half. That way it will all be fair, and I don't have to put up with this crying. I've already got seven others to take care of.

Anna: I do, Mom. I have Fred (younger brother) go up, and I go down!

Mom: Good. Now how 'bout the rest of you go play outside? It's beautiful out there! It's the warmest it's been all year, 45 degrees below 0!

Kids: Wow! I never thought it would warm up! I love Alaska!

Does anyone have an Xbox One? My gamertag is Chalkyfrog11. Add me and comment on this post telling me your gamertag.

I broke up with my ex girlfriend. Here's her number.

Sike, that's the wrong number!

ooooooooooooooooooooo

"Prince, I'm ready to chat when you are. I'm in bed, so yeah, let's chat! Love you!"

Why can’t orphans eat cereal with milk? Cause mummy never gave them some.

Why don't churches have Wi-Fi?

They can't compete with an invisible force that actually works.

After a long day of work, Kanye West goes to his Kanye Nest to take his Kanye Rest. He wakes up feeling his Kanye Best. Then he’ll get Kanye Dressed on his Kanye Vest to go on a Kanye Quest. He goes to church and becomes Kanye Blessed, then to a hotel room to be a Kanye Guest.

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  • What's a man's favorite thing that starts with "m" and ends with "arriage?"

    Miscarriage.