Worst Jokes Ever
I wasn't close to my dad when he died.
Which was good, he died to a landmine.
What is the difference between orphans and apples?
Apples get picked.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't find home.
I was in school yesterday and I saw this emo kid with a new cut, so I said, "I like ya cut g." And I slapped him. I don't know why I got in so much trouble. All I did was slap his wrist.
Why does an orphanage stay overnight at a school? Cause their parents won't pick them up.
What do you call a white man sandwiched between two black men in a blue sleeping bag?
An Oreo.
There are two doors leading to Heaven: one for henpecked husbands and one for unhenpecked husbands. The line to the door leading to Heaven for henpecked husbands was five abreast and five miles long. The line leading to the door to Heaven for unhenpecked husbands consisted of only one lonely man.
The guys from the henpecked husband line looked at the one man in the unhenpecked husband line and shout, “Hey, Charlie, why are you standing over there for?” Charlie glances over his shoulder and observes a sea of humanity of henpecked husbands as far as the eye can see and says grudgingly, “I don’t know. My wife told me to stand here.”
Si, papi?
Why can’t orphans have a house pet?
Because its parents have it to itself.
Your mama so fat she got in to the pool, the water got out and big mama! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
Q: How did Helen Keller get a concussion?
A: She kept stepping on a rake.
Did y'all ever hear about the great thunder crash of September 11th?
I would tell a joke, but I’m sad my dad died in 9/11. He’s the greatest pilot that went down with the Twin Towers.
I dreamed about drowning in an ocean made out of orange soda last night.
It took me a while to work out it was just a Fanta sea.
Uh, six teachers are annoying. Thank God I am not getting picked on at school or on this website.
Dmitriy has no mother.
Yo mama is so dumb, she plays Pokémon and doesn’t catch any.
My day started out great until I woke up.
What's the difference between an egg and a good wank?
You can beat an egg.
Why didn't Superman save the Twin Towers?
Because he's a quadriplegic.