Worst Jokes Ever
What’s the difference between a child and someone who has been kidnapped?
One of them is a domesticated pet.
Why is Bill the bad guy?
Monica wanted to suck dick.
What is more used than plastic?
Hookers.
How did my dad know I was gay?
He stuck his cock in me and I liked it.
How do you kill a sheep?
You lamb shank it!
What do you call New York City?
A human zoo.
I call my friends Dodo birds. Because they don't exist.
Q: Why did the student eat his homework?
A: Because the teacher said it was a piece of cake!
Twinkle, twinkle, there’s a car Coming like a shooting star.
I will stand in the way. I will not be seen again. Are you happy I am dead? Now you made it to the end.
My great grandpa killed Hitler.
Dark humor is like life:
Not everyone gets it.
Do not ever make fun of people who look like they have no necks. They are fully protected from vampires.
What did the other wave say to the other wave?
"Nothing, they just waved!"
Kid: I got homework.
Mom: Ok, so?
Kid: I got a F in my balls.
What happens if you play with Santa’s ball? You get a white Christmas.
Dam, sometimes when I look at my friend's head, I say, "Dam, that's a dam big head, Nick." Then he is like, "Dude, that's a literal dam."
What do you call a Chinese hooker that won't get on her knees?
Cantonese...
Why can't I get a girlfriend?
Because I'm a beta male simp.
What makes jokes because it's lonely and a complete and utter loser?
This guy, yep, this guy right here.
What moans about women but wouldn't exist without them? A triggered menimist.