Worst Jokes Ever
People always told me to open doors for elders. So I opened the plane door 5,000 feet up in the air for a grandma.
Life's a bitch, and then you die. I now see what they mean.
"What did we hit?"
"I don't know, a rock."
Priests are priests.
Why does an orphan go to a spelling bee?
So they can spell "home."
I was going to make alligator last night, but I noticed that I only had a crock pot.😅
What is the difference between a suicidal person and you? You're not dead.
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite movie? Cabbage Patch Kids.
When your girlfriend tells you she's a guy: "What, bitch? Naw, hell no!"
Can you really wheel my real wheelchair?
Try saying that over and over fast. Bit of a tongue twister.
What does it say on Stephen Hawking's headstone?
R. I. P. Roll in Peace.
Why don’t orphans play the game of hide-and-seek?
They won’t be found because no one will look for them.
No, Stephen Hawking wasn't the first man to walk on the moon.
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
They don't know where home is.
What Stephen Hawking doesn't know about wheelchairs isn't worth knowing.
What has teeth but doesn't use them to chew? The answer would be a comb or a piano, but technically, if you ripped someone's teeth out and hand them to them, they have teeth but can't chew with them.
Why can you say "Kobe" even though you missed?
Because he didn't land either.
How do you execute Stephen Hawking?
The electric wheelchair.
Knock knock.
You: Who's there?
Urmom.
Oh, ate the cheese? Urmom.