Worst Jokes Ever
Little Johnny was watching TV when he heard the TV say "bitch" and "bastard." He went over to his dad and said, "What is a bitch and bastard?" His dad looked at him surprised and said, "A bitch is a female, a bastard is a mailman." Johnny went back to the TV and heard them say "ass" and "shit," so he goes back to his dad and asks, "What shit and ass mean?" His dad says, "A shit is shaving cream like what I'm putting on my face, and ass is a coat, why don't you bug your mom?" Johnny goes back to the TV and hears them say "fuck," so Johnny goes over to his mom and says to her, "What does fuck mean, mom?" She looks over at him and says, "Fuck means carving, like what I'm doing to this turkey!" A few minutes later, Johnny hears a knock on the door. He walks over and answers it. He then says, "Welcome bitch and bastard, may I take your ass?" The people, looking horrified, then ask where his parents are. Johnny responds with, "My dad is putting shit on his face and my mom is fucking the turkey!"
I never touched kids, just women, but since I was famous, they were fine with it.
Why can't orphans play baseball? Because they can't find home.
Why can't an orphan build a website? Because it won't have a homepage.
Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7, 8, 9.
Do you know why 10 was scared? Because he was between 9/11.
What do you call a dog with no legs?
Disabled.
How do women make you a millionaire?
When you're a billionaire.
Who are the world's fastest readers?
The 9/11 suicide jumpers, they went through 110 stories in 5 seconds. Sorry.
All my 9/11 jokes crash and burn.
Wanna hear a joke? Me.
All my friends live in a forest. It's called Aokigahara.
Did you know Helen Keller had a dollhouse in her backyard?
No, and neither did she.
What movie do orphans hate? Full House 🏠
Me: I have depression.
Someone: You should get out more! Go outside!
Me: *goes to the beach* Now it's a tropical depression.
Walter White.
What happens when you fail to be an emo? You don't make the cut.
Where do orphans get their stuff from?
The reject shop.
Why is the US so bad at Clash Royale? Because they already lost two towers.
Why was the baby Dinosaur an orphan?
His family was blown up by meteors.
Technoblade never got a wife.