Worst Jokes Ever
What happens to emo kids when they go up?
They never come down.
Don’t challenge Death to a pillow fight. Unless you’re prepared for the reaper cushions.
If you don't like orphan jokes, WHY THE HELL ARE YOU ON HERE??!!! WE DON'T ACCEPT YOU HERE!
If you saw an orphan, could you say where your parents at? And if they cry, just say, "hey here are your parents" then grab nothing. Perfect example.
The doctor told me my temperature was exactly 98.6 degrees. I felt relieved until he said, “Celsius.”
Q: What does an orphan call a selfie of themself?
A: A family portrait.
What do dark humor and kids with cancer have in common? They never get old.
When David lost his ID, I called him Dave. Where did Dave go during the bombing? Everywhere. Guess who came crawling back?
Rangers are a joke.
I wish I was a dinosaur because all of them are dead.
What do you call a lesbian dinosaur?
A-lick-a-lot-of-puss.
A guy runs into a bar and yells, “Quick! How tall is a penguin?”
The bartender says, “Three feet tall.”
The guy says, “Oh my God! I just ran over a nun!”
Why is the Pentagon mad?
Because it didn't get two pizzas, but only one plane pizza.
The teacher asks, "Who is a Trump fan?" Everyone in the class, wanting to be liked by their teacher, all put their hands up, except for Little Johnny. The teacher asks, "Little Johnny, why are you being different again?" Little Johnny says, "Because I'm not a Trump fan." The teacher asks, "Why are you not a Trump fan?" and Little Johnny says, "Because my dad's a democrat and my mum's a democrat so I'm a democrat." And then his teacher says, "So if your dad was an idiot and your mum was a moron, what would that make you?" And Little Johnny replies, "A Trump fan."
What do you call basketball for disabled people?
Rocket League?
They say during sex you burn off as many calories as running 8 miles. Who the fuck runs 8 miles in 30 seconds?
What has two butts and kills people?
An assassin.
If they made a movie about your sex life, what would it be?
In Afghanistan, it would be "Twelve Years a Slave!" 🤣
What kind of car does Jesus drive?
A Christler.
What's the difference between depression and your ex?
Depression fucks you harder.
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
Because they can't make a home run.