Yours jokes
What does your girl do to me? She sucks me off.
Your momma is so fat, the whole Earth falls down to 100,000,000 ft.
China servers are up on Fortnite, yeah, check by there.
"China getting this dick in your mouth 😂"
A black boy walks into the kitchen where his mother is baking and accidentally pulls the flour over onto his head. He turns to his mother and says, “Look Mama, I’m a white boy!” His mother smacks him and says, “Go tell your Daddy what you just said!” The boy finds his father and says, “Look Daddy, I’m a white boy!” His Daddy bends him over, spanks him, stands the boy back up, and says, “Now, what do you have to say for yourself?” The boy replies, “I’ve only been a white boy for five minutes and I already hate you black people!”
Ex-Boyfriend: You have no ass, so we're through!
Me: Stop being a dickhead, dude!! It ain't gonna make your little sausage any bigger!
Q: How do you know when an Asian broke into your house?
A: You can't find your dog.
Here are some skeleton jokes.
You know the average person tries too hard and works himself to the bone.
If that joke didn't tickle your funny bone, I can give you a real humorous joke.
I used to play the trumpet, now I play the xylo-bone.
I'm always happy; nothing gets under my skin.
I made you some turkey for lunch. Bone appetit!
I'm glad I had you; I'm no longer bonely.
I've got a skele-ton of more jokes, but I'm just giving you one more.
Did you hear about the skeleton ninja? He was very skullful (skillful)!
A brother and a sister always got into fights. One day the brother tells the sister, "You're adopted!" The sister yells back, "At least they wanted me!"
I see that you start work at 9am, but your hairline starts at 9:15am.
How do you stop a baby from drowning?
-Lift up your foot.
Why was your mom so into me?
'Cause she was the man.
When you're bored, punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
Why are school shooting jokes so funny?
Answer: The bullets hit your funny bone!
Your Parents
You're gay, lol.
A man from France, a man from Britain, and a man from New York are on an expedition to the Amazon Forest. After a while, they get lost.
So as they are walking, suddenly the bushes jump up into the air and men with spears are there. One man says, "Hey, you're in our sacred land. So what we are going to do is skin you and then use your flesh to make canoes. But we aren’t that crazy so we will let you choose how you die."
The man from France said, "Bring me the poison." The man from Britain said, "Bring me the gun." And the man from New York said, "Bring me a gun as well!"
The guy was confused but still brought the items and gave them to them. The guy from France said, “For the France!” and drank the poison and died. The man from Britain said, “Long live the queen!” and shot himself and died. And the man from New York started shooting and laughing like a mad man and said. 3 men lived through this and one said to the others, "Well...sh!# that didn't go as planned."
If you're pan, all you have to do is get a sibling and make them get your parents to the outside of the pantry, and you burst out and then say you're pansexual!
You don't usually see strap-hangers carrying newspapers these days.
But one guy with the New York Times is seen getting on a crowded F Train. He notices a single seat not taken. Suspicious, he gets closer and sniffs it out. The seat is discolored but dry. Throwing caution to the winds, he removes a section from the paper and sets it down to buffer the spot from his behind. He sits down, stretches his feet and yells out: "Try sitting on your smartphones, suckers!"
Q: What is the difference between a stripper and a bungee cord?
A: It's cheap, fast, and if the rubber breaks, you're pretty much screwed.
What's the hardest part of eating bald pussy? Pulling the diapers back up when you're done!