You're

You're jokes

Doctor

  • You're so ugly that when you were born, the doctor threw you out the window, and the window threw you back.

    Mama

  • Yo mama so fat, when she got on the scale it said, “I need your weight, not your phone number.”

    Pee

  • When I'm peeing in a toilet I don't pee directly into the water. I pee on the curved part of the bowl beside the water because I figure it splashes less, but when you're peeing that close to the edge, the sporadic tiny offshoots of pee become a greater threat.

    I'm not sure if the accumulation of these offshoots is greater than the potential splashback from peeing mid-bowl. It's possible that I'm thinking about this too much, but it's also possible that I'm not thinking about this enough.

    Hairline

  • Your hairline's so far back, you need binoculars to see it.

    Man, your hairline is so far back, archaeologists couldn't find it.

    Forehead

  • Why is your forehead so shiny? Did somebody laminate you? You're so shiny, Mulan can look into your forehead and sing "Reflection."