A pedophile and a priest run a race.
You can’t beat yourself in a race!
You Jokes
What do you call yourself when you fist a midget?
A ventriloquist.
What do you call it when a gay guy farts?
An abortion.
What do you call a house party for slaves?
An auction house.
How much context, pecker? You Press context categoria, go Discord.
Drink tea with friend game night.
Ali from Kazakhstan, he got small forehead, all his friends laugh. They say, "Ali, your forehead so tiny, you need magnifying glass to see!" But Ali, he not care, he proud of his unique look. When he wear hat, it look like top of mountain, so funny, everyone laugh with him. Ali know small forehead no problem, it make him special, like rare gem!
Bro, you ever think while driving the moped why they call it a footrest when the foot never lets it rest? The foot is working harder than the engine. You push, push, but still go the same speed like a turtle with a bad mood during a rabbit race...
A Jew and a Jew walk into a bar. The goy says, "What do you want?" The first Jew says, "Give it alcohol." The second Jew says, "My son ran away and became Christian." Another Jew pipes in, he says, "My son too!" The bartender turns around and says, "You're not going to believe this..."
Don't listen to people when they say you have a dad bod. You don't.
You have a father figure.
Guys, should I do it? You know what I mean.
If someone licks your elbow, you won't feel it.
If you put your ear up to someone's leg, you can hear them say, "WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?!"
Do you think John F. Kennedy went for a ride in Dallas just to clear his head because his wife said he was close-minded?
Did you ever think that John F. Kennedy went for a ride in Dallas just to clear his head?
I just watched a 9/11 documentary on a plane. Man next to me said, "You know we're going to New York, right?" I told him I just wanna know what I got into.
You know how bad of a person you are when you figure out how long you wait to smash. For me and my girlfriend, it was between the first plane crash and the last tower falling.
I had a friend who got shot in the head.
Guess you could say he was...
Blown Away!
Me: Are you an orphan?
Orphan: Yes, how did you know and what gave me away?
Me: Where's your parents?
Orphan: They died and I have a phone, why?
Me: Because it has a home button.
A fat homeless person begged me for food, so I said, "I can see your dinner. You had plenty!"
What do you call a dear with no eyes?
I have no eye deer!
What do you call an autistic person playing a guitar?
Guarded.
