You jokes
Knock knock, Who's there? Dad. You came back?
You work at Papa's Pizzeria, ok?
Boss: You're fired!
Me: Ok?
Worker: Why are you fired?
Me: Oh, you wanna know...
*shows him the oven with my pizza*
Me: I left my pizza in the oven, that bitch burnt as fuck!!
Worker: OH SHIT!!
Boss: Did you say pizza?
Me: I sure did!
*shows boss pizza in oven*
Me: This hoe black as fuck!
Boss: I fired you because I can't stop looking at your ass, not this why?
Roses are red, violets are blue, I have a joke, so are you.
What do you call the ghost of the Thanksgiving turkey? A Poultrygeist.
You know how on Snapchat "hmu" means hit me up? A school posted "smu." Nikolas Cruz responded.
Friend says, "You were so drunk last night, you threw a mushroom at a midget and said, 'Grow, Mario, grow.'"
Let me tell you a joke about pizza!
Never mind...
It's too cheesy.
Are you a banana...
because I find you a-peeling!
Science gets you to the moon.
Religion flies you into buildings.
Friend: Knock, knock.
Me: Who's there?
Friend: Short.
Me: Short who?
Friend: Short you!
Me: 🙁
Friend: 🤣
Knock knock. Who's there? Depression. Depression who? Depression you!
What do you get when you get yourself a deer with no eyes?
You get no-eye-deer.
What do you call the bear that pushes all the other bears into the pool?
The dry bear.
What do you call a group of redneck superheroes?
The Inbredibles.
Have you heard the new pickup line in a gay bar?
Can I push your stool in for ya?
How do you make a blind girl smile? Leave the plunger in the toilet.
Who are you?
Oh, I'm an orphan!
Oh... bye! :/
Roses are red.
Violets are blue.
Once I'm done choking you,
You will be too.
Have you ever heard of Jane Doe? Well, her husband's name is Dill, so I guess that makes him a dildo!
FRIEND: Hey, want to come to my house?
LONELY ORPHAN/TRUMP: Want to come to my orphange?
FRIEND: Dude, I'm blocking you!
LONELY ORPHAN: :(