I broke the sink yesterday the handle just blew right off! my dad was so mad he blew his stack!

I was just informed that my ex was stabbed yesterday…lets just say i quit my job as a butcher

one day chemistry teacher asked his student whose name is Raj waht is chemical formula of water the Raj replied HIJKLMNO TEACHER WHAT IS THESE RUBBISH THE RAJ REPLIED YESTERDAY YOU THOGHT CHEMICAL FORMULA OF WATER IS H2O,

So today is my birthday today am 13 but yesterday am going to turn 10.but am not even go to school to know the number ten becuase one time at 10 pm in the morning it was so cold in in my hot room so I want outside to drive my car to drive my car. But I stopped becuase the light turn green.i was talking a bath in the front of my car out it didn’t have bin so am taking a sh$t

Father and mother are making love in the bedroom. Mother is on top of father. Suddenly the son enters the bedroom. Everyone is embarrassed, of course.

The next morning, the mother takes the little boy aside and says, “I’ll tell you about what you saw yesterday, you know Dad has a big belly and that’s why mom sometimes sits on top of that belly to push it flat.” . Says that little boy: “But mama, that does not make any difference.” “Oh no?” the mom asks. “No,” says the little boy, “When you go to work, the neighbor comes, and she puts herself on her knees for Dad, and sheblows his belly up again!”

Yesterday, my daughter was playing in the garden when I saw her kill a butterfly. So to teach her a lesson, I said, “Just for that you don’t get any butter for a month.”

Today in the kitchen, she killed a cockroach. I said, “Nice try.”

Did you hear about the cannibal who passed a politician in the jungle yesterday?

I hear it hurt like hell

one day there were these 3 cow boys sitting next to a fire and they were telling each other about their adventures well the first cow boy said i tangled with a bull that killed 6 people so i wrestled that son of a bitch to the ground with my bare hands the second cow boy said that’s nothing yesterday i was walking on a trale and came across a rattler so i picked it up ,bit its head off and drank all his venom in one gulp the third cow boy remained quiet stering the embers of the fire with his penis

I killed a Wood elf yesterday. The gaurd charged me with…mer-der

I’ve had the best butterfingers, yesterday. - I dropped it.

Kid -dad I want santa to give me iphone Indian poor dad- son santa is deaf Kid-no he is not I saw him on Tv yesterday Indian poor dad-oh actually I asked him to for a new wife may be he is wearing AirPods Kid-you are my santa daddy Indian poor dad- pull down you pants son Kid-it’s not apple product Indian poor dad -its banana

I fell down yesterday

Watched a really cool cartoon about rabbits with downs syndrome yesterday you should try watch it on catch up… Watership Downs

“was lost in the woods yesterday,”

“i was in some sticky situation…”

Yesterday, I saw an advert with random woman dancing, and someone said that they were beautiful. And then I said “Except the fat people.” And then I got sent to my room for saying that.

Yesterday a 5-year-old dyslexic boy almost saved his mother from drowning, but he kept dialing 119…

Me and my cousin went to a restaurant yesterday I ordered my chicken fried, he ordered his chicken alive