Women jokes
Today I put the women’s rights book in the fantasy section of a library.
Why do they call it abortion? Because they aborted the mission.
Me: What has two legs and bleeds?
Friend: Um, women? Obviously?
Me: Actually, half a dog. So you're still right.
Women are only for sex!
They are good for cooking and sex!
Nothing but those things.
When a guy falls, it hurts them there. When a woman falls, it hurts more.
I like my coffee like I like my women.
Big tits.
I asked a European what do you call Karens in your country? He said, "American women."
I’d make a joke about prostitutes and women sleeping with multiple men, but it would just be whore-ible.
I never touched kids, just women, but since I was famous, they were fine with it.
What shoe shop would be a lesbian's best friend, decimen?
Women getting paid is bad, women should not get paid...
What is the best way to pick up a woman from the bar?
Spike her drink with roofies.
I'm not saying I'm ugly...
But when I'm watching porn, the hot, sexy women in my area always pop up and ask me if I'm rich.
Why are women like diapers?
They’re usually full of shit, but thankfully disposable.
I was at work and a few fat women came up to me and asked for some help.
Later that week, I ran into them on the dance floor. One of them asked me if I wanted to dance. I told her no. The other asked me if I knew what was cracking. I calmly said, "The floor."
You know, it takes a lot of balls to successfully compete in women’s sports as a man.
At the library, I got in trouble for putting a cooking book in the women's section.
Walked into a bar the other day and a group of sailors were being loud and shouting about all the women they have in port that had given them gonorrhea...
Bloody seamen.
What is the difference between a feminist and a gorilla?
At least gorillas don't abort their own.
I like my women like my coffee—ground up and frozen.