Woah jokes

Little Johnny went on a camping trip. All the tents were taken, so he shared with the teacher. So Little Johnny says: "Can I play with your bellybutton? My mom always lets me when we camp." So the teacher says: "Sure." 5 minutes later the teacher says: "Woah, woah, woah that's not my bellybutton!" Little Johnny says: "Woah, woah, woah, that's not my finger."

Woah man, you need to take a step back. Your hairline did, so I am sure you can.

Little Jimmy asked his mom if he could take a bath with her since he was scared of being alone. She said, "Sure, just don't look up." He looked up and said, "Woah, what are those?" She replied, "Those are just headlights." He looked down and said, "What is that?" She said, "That's just a bush." The next day, mommy wasn't home, so he asked to take a shower with his papa instead. He said, "Okay, but don't look up." He looked up and said, "Woah, what is that?" His papa replied, "That's just a snake." Later that night, he asked to sleep with his parents. They said, "Okay, just don't look under the covers." After a while, he grew bored and went under the covers. Jimmy screamed, "Mom, turn on the headlights, the snake is in the bush!"

Someone asked me my gender... I said, "Woah, man."

Woah, nice cock.

The more suicidal people there are, the less suicidal people there are... Woah!

My girlfriend is so fat, she looked into the mirror and said, "Woah, there are two of me!"

So an orphan goes to the store and gets a bunch of cartons of milk.

The cashier goes, "Woah, why so much?"

The orphan goes, "My dad never came back with the milk, so, well, here we are!"

Billy and Bobby were walking to school one day. Billy pulled out an mp3 player.

"What's that?" Bobby inquired.

"Oh, just something to zone out the other kids," Billy responded.

The next day, Billy and Bobby were walking to school. Billy rummaged through his backpack and pulled out an mp4 player this time.

"Woah! What's that?" Bobby inquired.

"Oh, just a lil something to shut out the annoying kids at school," Billy responded.

The next day, Bobby noticed Billy's backpack was particularly heavy looking. Billy rummaged through his backpack just outside the school and pulled out an mp5 rifle.

"Holy shit, dude! What the fuck is that for?" Bobby gasped.

"Nice huh? This'll shut those fuckers up for good!" Billy replied.

In our history class we were on our China unit and learning a little about gunpowder.

And I said "WOAH THAT'S LIT!"

"Ukraine looks like Fallout 4, woah!"

Friend 1: *turns off lights*

Friend 2: *is there with us*

Me: Woah! Where did friend 2 go?!

Hey woah man, and Alya how are you guys? Oh and hbu jk master? How is life right now? Is it hard? You wanna talk?

Whatever happened to the emo? (wrong answer only)

"Explain bear is a homosexual, confirmed."

I am whooping my doge's a$$. If you like, you can free him.

REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

We gotta keep it goin' ▄【デc̷a̷t̷══━一.