Why jokes
There are two doors leading to Heaven: one for henpecked husbands and one for unhenpecked husbands. The line to the door leading to Heaven for henpecked husbands was five abreast and five miles long. The line leading to the door to Heaven for unhenpecked husbands consisted of only one lonely man.
The guys from the henpecked husband line looked at the one man in the unhenpecked husband line and shout, “Hey, Charlie, why are you standing over there for?” Charlie glances over his shoulder and observes a sea of humanity of henpecked husbands as far as the eye can see and says grudgingly, “I don’t know. My wife told me to stand here.”
Why do babies cry? Cuz they can't suck very well.
But why?
Why couldn’t wheelchair Harry Potter go to Hogwarts?
They had no wheelchair ramps or elevators...
Why is 8 afraid of 7 because 7 8 9. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA LOL
Why did he not love anymore? His battery died.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the bitch’s house.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
The chicken.
Why do kids want to become cops? They want to find the guy who touched them.
Why can’t orphans tell jokes?
Because their parents can’t *bear* the *jeans* because they don’t have any.
"Herishy, me lava u, why did u leave mee? Wahh wahh baby sharka, doodle do to to babyyy cutie pie..."
Why didn't the wife want sex?
Because they were having too many babies.
Son: Mom, can I get $100 for a week?
Mom: Why do you need $100 for a week?
Son: I'm going on a date, and I need $100 for a week, please.
Mom: No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Go on your date now. You got $1, so go.
Son: And you got $0.00.
Why can’t an orphan play baseball?
Because they don’t know where home is. 😂😂😂😂😂😂
Why did the cow go to space? To go to the moon!
Why did the banana go to the doctor?
What is black and white and red all over? A newspaper.
Why didn’t the orphan celebrate their birthday?
Because they didn’t have a mom to birth them.
GF: Laying down.
BF: GROANING
GF: Are you good at aiming and shooting?
BF: Yeah, why?
GF: Shoot that did in there.
BF: Mmmhuugh
Hungry: Dad, I'm hungry.
Dad: Hi, Hungry, I'm Dad.
Hungry: Why did you name me like this? :/
Why is a circle gay?
It's not straight.
A woman goes to buy a parrot.
There is one for 200, 500, and one for 15 bucks.
She asks why the last one is so cheap.
The man at the counter says, "It used to live in a brothel/sex house."
The lady buys it anyway.
When she gets home, it says, "Fuck me, a new brothel!"
When her daughters get home, it says, "Fuck me, 2 new prozzies!"
When the father gets home, the parrot says, "Fuck me, Daryl, haven't seen you in the brothel in weeks!"