Why jokes
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because there would be no home base.
Johnny was watching TV when he heard them say "bitch" and "bastard," so he asked his dad, "What is a bitch and bastard?"
Dad said, "A bitch is a female, and a bastard is a male."
Then Johnny goes back to the TV and hears them say "ass" and "shit," so he asks his dad what "shit" and "ass" means. Dad says, "A shit is shaving cream, like what I'm putting on my face, and ass is a coat. Why don't you bug your mom?"
So Johnny goes back to the TV, and then they say "fuck," so Johnny asks his mom what "fuck" means. Mom says, "Fuck means carving, like doing to the turkey." Then a few minutes later, Johnny hears a knock on the door, so he answers it. He then says, "Welcome, bitch and bastard, may I tack your ass?" The people then ask where his parents are. Johnny says, "My dad is putting shit on his face, and my mom is fucking the turkey."
Why did piglet go to the bathroom?
To search for Poo.
Why don’t cows have any money?
Because farmers milk them dry.
Father: I’m taking your toys to the orphanage.
Child: But why?
Father: So you won’t be bored. You’re going to need them there.
Emos are dark people....
...So why are they all white?
Goths are even darker...
SO WHY ARE THEY WHITER!?
Why did the disabled kid keep getting bullied?
He couldn’t stand up for himself.
Why do heterosexual men and heterosexual women believe that bisexual men don't exist because male bisexuality doesn't exist? Because it doesn't cycle 🚲.
Why are Indians so good at football?
Each time they get a corner, they open a shop.
Why did Joe Biden visit Hiroshima? Because the city has the hottest prepubescent girls in the world.
Do you know why I hate pedophiles? They are fucking immature kids!
Why did the Titanic sink? It loved the iceberg!
Why did Shawn suddenly fly to Mount Everest, leaving behind friends, family, and food?
Someone told him that "Shelby"'s coming 'round the mountain.
Why do gay people like sports?
Because they get to play with balls.
Why don't parents get school shooting jokes? They're aimed at a younger audience.
Why did the cow lick your mum?
Because she had a cream pie.
Why can’t Asians play baseball?
Because they can’t see the ball.
Dad, why are we here?
Because you're not loved.
A momma cow and three baby calves are on a farm. The first baby calf asks the momma cow, "Mom, why is my name Rose?"
The mom responded, "Well, you see, when you were born, a rose petal fell on your head."
The second one asks her, "Then why is my name Daisy?"
The mom chuckled and simply replied with, "When you were born, Daisy petals fell on your head."
The last one said, "DUH DUR SURH!"
The mom said, "SHUT UP, CINDER BLOCK!"
Why do I go around making orphan jokes? Because they can't go crying to their parents. 😅