Why jokes
Why do nuns go around in pairs?
So one nun makes sure the other nun doesn't get none!
Why did the orange start blushing?
Because it saw the salad dressing!
Why did lil Timmy drop his lollies?
He was hit by a train.
Why can't orphans play baseball? Because they don't know where home is...
Why did Stephen Hawking die? He ran out of WiFi.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the gay guy's house. Knock, knock. Who's there? Chicken.
Why did the accountant fall off his bicycle?
Because he lost his balance!
Why do people always talk about 9/11, but seriously, just let it sit there, like the rubble it is.
Why did Sally's pizza get cold? Because she has no arms.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They don't know where home is. Sorry for the dark joke :>
I was digging in my garden when I found a treasure chest full of gold. I was about to run inside and tell my wife, but then I remembered why I was digging in my garden.
Why did Alice from Wonderland get her butt stuck in the rabbit hole at first? Because she probably ate too many hamburgers and drank too much wine just out of nowhere, then told her butt to hold it in before more food pops out.
Why do lesbians have the highest rate of domestic violence?
Because women are emotional and full of drama.
A sailor drops anchor in a port and heads into the nearest pub. Everyone in the pub is whispering and pointing at him because of his odd shaped body; he has a very muscular body, but a very tiny head on his shoulders.
As he orders his drink, he tells the bartender, "I'll explain. I get this in every port and town I visit. I caught a mermaid and she granted me three wishes if I would release her back into the sea. So I told her I wanted a yacht and, sure enough, she came through for me. Next, I asked for a million bucks and now I am set for life. Last of all, I asked her if I could have sex with her and her response was, 'I don't know how you can make love to me with your type of body.' So I asked her, 'How about a little head?'"
When I was walking home, a couple of married guys were saying, "Your mom is good at her job," but I realized my mom doesn't work.
So I ask my mom, "Why are these guys saying you're good at your job? You don't work." My mom said, "Yeah, I got a new job." So I said, "What do you do?" My mom said, "Job hand, no, I mean it's called a hand job."
Why did Stephen Hawking not believe in God?
Computers don’t really have a specific religion.
Why do cows have big [udders]? Because they have big balls.
Q: Why can't orphans be gay?
A: Because they don't have anyone they can call "Daddy."
Why can't an orphan role-play Star Wars?
Because they have no one to play Darth Vader.
Why do women have periods? Because they deserve them!