Why jokes
Why is Afghanistan good at chess? They take the rooks out fast.
What is the biggest fear of an American soldier taking a piss in a bush during the Vietnam war? His manhood will be chopped off.
Why can't an orphan ever be a criminal?
Because he isn't wanted.
Why was the orphan so successful?
Because his options were to go bigger or go home. He only had one choice. :)
Why should you never give an orphan a phone?
Because they wouldn't be able to find the home button.
Why did the blonde stare at the Ford?
Because it said, "Focus."
Memes
Why do you wrap a hamster in duct tape?
So it doesnât explode when youâre fucking it.
Why is Jeffrey Epstein so bad at races?
Because he comes in a little behind.
Why donât some couples go to the gym?
Because some relationships donât work out.
Why did the frog take the train to work? His car got toad.
Children who are unvaccinated are less likely to have autism. You know why?
-You have to be alive to have autism.
Why did God create yeast infections?
So women would know what it's like to live with an annoying cunt.
Why canât you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom?
Because the âPâ is silent.
Why are womenâs feet so small?
So they can stand closer to the sink.
Q: Why was 10 afraid?
A: Because he was always between 9/11.
*WARNING* THIS WILL NEVER GET OUT OF YOUR HEAD - READ IF YOU DARE.....
What came first? The chicken or the egg?
Which came first? The color orange or the fruit?
Who taught the first ever teacher?
If you expect the unexpected, doesn't that make the unexpected expected?
If you describe something as 'indescribable', then haven't you already described it?
In the word 'scent', is the silent letter the 's' or the 'ce'?
Why do your lips touch when they say the word 'separate', but don't touch when you say the word 'together'?
How many photos do you think you could be in the background of?
The guy who discovered cow milk, what was he doing with that cow?
Do regular dogs see police dogs and think, "Oh no, it's a cop"?
Is it possible to cry underwater?
If two left handers have an argument, who is right?
I warned you!! You just didn't listen.... :O
Why was it cold in Stephen Hawking's house?
Because he had a new window open...
When Mother Teresa went to heaven, she was greeted by Saint Peter with a halo for her dedication to the needy. After walking around for a while, she saw Lady Diana with a bigger halo. She got angry at Lady Diana and went to Saint Peter and asked him why she had a bigger one, and Saint Peter said, "Oh, thatâs not a halo, thatâs a steering wheel."
Man: "I know how to please a woman." Woman: "Then please leave me alone."
Man: "I want to give myself to you." Woman: "Sorry, I don't accept cheap gifts."
Man: "Your hair color is fabulous." Woman: "Thank you. It's on aisle three at the corner drug store."
Man: "You look like a dream." Woman: "Go back to sleep."
Man: "I can tell that you want me." Woman: "Yes, I want you to leave."
Man: "Hey, baby, what's your sign?" Woman: "Do not enter. -OR- Stop."
Man: "Your body is like a temple." Woman: "Sorry, there are no services today."
Man: "Is this seat empty?" Woman: "Yes, and this one will be too if you sit down."
Man: "What's it like being the most beautiful girl in the bar?" Woman: "I hate you."
Man: "Haven't I seen you someplace before?" Woman: "Yeah, that's why I don't go there anymore."
Why did the topless woman shout, "Stop raping us?"
Because she was uneducated.
Why is rape, rape? Because she is too busy enjoying the moment to say yes.