Why jokes
Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she didn’t have any arms.
Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.
Want to know why some astronomers are gay?
It’s because they want to be in Uranus.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To go to the bitch house.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
The chicken.
Why did God make pigs before politicians?
He just needed some practice.
Q: Why was the leper hockey game cancelled?
A: There was a face off in the corner.
A young boy is in a tepee with his father, just after his sister's naming ceremony. Curious to how it works, he asks his dad, "Father, why is my sister's name Tulip?"
His father responds, "That is her name because a tulip was the first thing she saw when she first opened her eyes."
The boy was still puzzled. "What about big brother Sparrow?"
"His name is Sparrow because a sparrow landed on him when he first began walking."
The boy finally asked how he was named. "Well, we decided to name you the same way as your sister."
The boy nods with understanding, "Thank you, father."
"No problem, Two-Dogs-Fucking."
Abner’s wife was laying on her death bed. She suddenly used all her strength to sit up and say to her husband, “I must tell you something, or my soul will never know peace. I have been unfaithful to you, Abner. In this very house, not one month ago.”
“Hush, dear,” soothed Abner. “I know all about it. Why else have I poisoned you?”
Why did the chicken ride across town? Because he was being taken to Tyson.
Why did the lion lose the race? Because he was playing with a cheetah.
Why is there AC in hospitals?
To keep all the vegetables fresh.
Why do seagulls fly over the sea and not the bay?
Because then they would be called bagels! 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
Why did the murderer invest in condoms? To kill the future buyers!
Why couldn’t the toilet paper cross the street?
Because it got stuck in a crack :)
Why were the Twin Towers knocked over? Chuck Norris was leaning on one of them.
I'm starting to wish my grass was emo.
Why?
So it would cut itself.
Why was the blunt pencil bad at making speeches? It never had a point.
Why can't orphans play catch?
Because they don't have parents to catch the ball.
Today is a gift. That’s why we call it the present.
Why did the penguin pull out a tooth? It was Mexican.
I know a girl in a wheelchair. I realize now why she couldn’t do sports because the coaches wanted 100% from her, but she was only able to give 50%.