Why jokes

God

  • Why are Egyptian gods orphans?

    Because Egypt needs to sell Anubis (a new bus) every year to make a prophet.

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  • Cream

  • Little Johnny is watching his mum rubbing cold cream on her face, and he asks her, "Why are you rubbing that stuff on your face, mother?"

    His mother replies, "To make myself beautiful, Johnny."

    A few minutes later, she starts rubbing the cream off with a tissue. Johnny says to her, "What is the matter? Are you giving up?"

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  • Chess

  • Why doesn’t the US want to play chess with the UK?

    The US is already down 2 towers, and the UK has an unkillable queen.

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  • Cheetah

  • This one is for Gwen, I'm sorry people are so mean to you.

    All the big cats gathered for a game of poker. Why did the tiger lose?

    Because one of his opponents kept on lion. Another had a puma-nent poker face. But the real problem was the cheetah.

    Principal

  • Little Johnny brought a baseball bat to school.

    The teacher asked why he had one. He said, "I need it to beat up the principal!"

    When the principal found out what Little Johnny had said, well, let’s just say Little Johnny didn’t need no baseball bat to kill him.

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