What's the difference between a knife and my life? A knife has a point
what do u call a preist in a room full of naked boys a Colonoscopy
What type of tape do kidnappers use?
Abduct-Tape
What kind of dreams do hotels have?
Suite dreams
What is the most popular fish in the ocean? "A starfish."
What do you call a candle in armor?
A knight light
What's the difference between a baby and an onion?
One screams when I peel it's skin off.
What is Steven hawking's least favorite movie? Standing tall
What do Michael Jackson and the Captain from the Spongebob theme song have in common? They both say "are you ready kids?"
What’s one thing you can say at a funeral and during sex.
She was too young.
⚠️I’m not racist it’s just a joke⚠️
What do you call four black ppl in a sleeping bag ...... A Kit Kat
What did Donald Trump serve to Justin Trudeau at a state dinner?
Poutine with Russian dressing!
what do you do when you get locked outside your house...... you talk to the lock. because communication is key.
I asked my North Korean friend, "what's it like to live in North Korea?" He responded, "can't complain."
What is the favorite dish in Africa? The empty one.
You know what the worst thing about gang rape is?
Having to wait your turn.
What do you call a girl with an hourglass figure? -- A waist of time.
What do a shopping cart and a wheel chair have in common... they both carry vegetables
What's the difference between sand and a dildo? Sand has never gone up my ass.
what did they do with michael jackson when he died
he got so many plastic surgeries that they melted him down into legos and let kids play with him for a change
