Whats jokes

Two terrorists walk into a bar.

The bartender asks what they are talking about. Terrorist 1 says, "We are going to kill 14k people and a donkey."

The Bartender asks, "Why a donkey?"

Then Terrorist 2 says, "See, I told you no one would care about the 14k people."

What’s the difference between how you watch porn and I watch porn?

The windows we watch through.

What are Michael Jackson's favorite sodas? Yoo-hoo-hoo and Mountain Dew-hoo-hoo. What cola company should people get to keep him at bay? Pep-see-hee.

Q. What's the biggest cause of infant drownings? A. Postpartum depression.

Why are orphans so bad at poker?

They don’t know what a full house looks like.

What do alcoholics and amputees have in common?

They are both legless.

What did the cow say to the leather chair?

“Hi Mom!”

I once saw a one-handed man in a second-hand store. I told him, “I don’t think they have what you’re looking for, sir.”

What’s the difference between a Black person and snow tires?

Snow tires still work after you take the chains off.

What’s the difference between your dad and your hairline?

Nothing, they both ran off.

In what city do you always lose your mum? Mumbai.

What's the difference between milk and a cancer patient?

There's none, they both don't age well.

What is a black person's least favorite word game?

Hangman.

Doctor: "I am so sorry, I cannot see you today."

Orphan: "Oh, okay. What about tomorrow?"

Doctor: "No, I can't see you ever."

Orphan: "Why?"

Doctor: "Because I am a family doctor."

What’s better than Stephen Hawking?

Stephen walking.

What’s the difference between chocolate and people?

You can’t buy people nowadays.

What’s the best part about being a circumcision doctor?

The pay is good and you also get to keep the tips!

What’s the difference between my ex and a unicycle?

A unicycle can only take one person at a time.

What's the hardest thing when working with the severely mentally handicapped?

My dick.

Q: What's the difference between a nun and a woman in a bathtub?

A: One has hope in her soul and one has soap in her hole.