What’s the bravest thing a man can do?
Say, “I’m going to get milk!” to his wife and kids.
Whats Jokes
What world record did the people in 9/11 get?
The world record for going down 80 floors in a matter of seconds.
Thing 1: What's the difference between nuts and almonds?
Thing 2: I don't know, what?
Thing 1: One gets hard faster.
What do you call six gay men in a war? Rainbow Six Siege.
What does Sonic say when he's bored?
Punch an orphan, what are they going to do, tell their parents?
What's a fish without eyes?
A fsh.
What's the difference between an orphan and a watermelon?
One is fun to hit with a sledgehammer; the other one is just an orphan.
What do you call a person with a fat brain?
A fat neek!
What do you call a Chinese car thief?
Tommy Tookamota.
What's the difference between a tornado and a divorce down south?
Nothing. Someone's losing a trailer.
What do you call hot cups?
Sunglasses.
What does the beet DJ say when he's partying?
"Dance to the beet, y'all!"
What did a skeleton say when he's alone?
"I'm so bonely..."
What is the postman's favorite fruit?
Water-mail-on.
What do you say to your pet when you're super tired, slow, and worn out?
"I'm totally dogging it today..."
What did the window say to the door?
"What are you squeaking about? I'm the one with the panes!"
Get it?
What did the human say to the fly when it was buzzing around the human's head?
"Would you stop bugging me!"
What is the best way to make a leaf?
Go down, back around, and stir up a tree. Make it spin, watch again. Oven baking, ding, we're done!
So, I was in school, and there was a number saying "696969," so I said to my mother, "What does it mean?" She said, "Your fucking dad and I!"
What did Helen Keller say when she jumped off a bridge? "(sign language)"
