New Whats Jokes - Page 312 - Worst Jokes Ever

If all your clothes were stolen, what would you go home in?

The dark.

What's the difference between intelligence and apathy?

I don't know! I don't care!

What does an emo kid and pizza have in common?...... The pizza doesn’t cut itself.

What will you call Burj Khalifa after 100 years?

"Bujurg" Khalifa. (Just a joke)

What's braver than coming out gay? Taking a shit in an elementary school bathroom with those two kids that always mess with you and turn off the lights.

What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef.

What do you call a dog with no legs? No point in calling, he won't come anyway :(

What do you get when King Kong steps on Batman and Robin?

Flatman and Ribbon.

What does an iPhone have that orphans do not?

Home buttons.

FaceBook Story: My mom loves FaceBook; she literally posts every day, but this day was sort of a hard hit.

So what happened was my mom got tired of her old name on Facebook, so she changed it to Thatmilf85, and I don't want to explain what milf means, but she got a lot of DM's from a lot of old guys. BUT, this one exact guy named Johnny Sins asked my mom if she wanted to do an adult film. I don't know what that is. I think it's an adult movie, of course, so she says yes and flies out to San Diego, and she never came back after yesterday, and to YOU Johnny Sins, my mom better be Ok and that adult film better be an adult movie and not a por...

What show can the orphan relate to... Full House.

What's an orphan's favorite toy?

A boomerang, because it always comes back.

What’s the difference between McDonald’s and 9/11?

One is a drive through; the other is a fly through.

What is the best way to get chewing gum out of your hair?

Cancer.

What's the difference between a piano, a pot of glue, and a tuna fish?

You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna.

What about the glue?

I knew you'd get stuck there.

What do you call people who jumped in the dam?

A dam fool.

Little Johnny is in class one day, and little Timmy starts laughing. The teacher says, "What's so funny?" He said, "I can see your bra strap." The teacher says, "Don't come back to class for a week," so he gets up and walks out. A few minutes later, little Billy starts laughing, and she asks, "What's funny now?" Little Billy said, "I can see both of your bra straps." The teacher says, "Get out of my classroom for a month." So little Billy got pissed, he walked out and slammed the door. This scared the teacher, and she dropped the chalk. She picked it up, then she stood back up, and she sees little Johnny walking out of the classroom. She asked, "Where do you think you're going?" He said, "Well, teach, after what I saw, I'm done with school for a lifetime."