Whats jokes
What keeps an emo kid from hitting the ground?
The rope.
What's the difference between a Catholic priest and the devil?
The devil always has horns... not just around children.
What has nut, long, big, and sticky? A Snickers bar.
What do Michael Jackson and a plastic bag have in common?
They both are plastic and like kids.
Did Delaware wear a New Jersey? Idaho, Alaska?
What it actually means: Did Delaware wear a New Jersey? I don’t know. I’ll ask her.
P.S. My dad is a history teacher and he told me to put this in here.
What do you call a murderer with two butts? An assassin.
What’s a zebra? A few sizes bigger than an A.
My teacher asked us what sex is. My friend, Bobby, got up and said in a loud, clear voice, "Sex is a temptation caused by a sensation, where a boy puts his location into a woman's destination to increase the population of the next generation. Do you understand my explanation, or do you need a demonstration?" The teacher shot him 23 times before she fainted.
What kind of flour do orphans use to bake bread?
Self-raising flour.
The daughter walks up to her father and asks him, "Dad, can I ask you something?"
The father says, "Of course, what's your question?"
The daughter replies and asks, "How do you feel about abortion?"
The father says, "Why don't you ask your sister?"
The daughter replies, "I don't have a sis-"
What does an emo kid say when they wanna hang out?
"Wanna hang?"
What’s the difference between Jesus and a painting of Jesus?
You only need 1 nail to hang a painting!
What’s black and at the top of a stair case?
Stephen Hawking during a house fire.
What do you get when you cross a vampire with a teacher?
Lots of blood tests!
Son: What's for dinner tonight?
Mom: Steak!
Son: Mom, you know I only eat veggies, so what's for me?
Mom: HUNGER!
What did the taco say to the Sea Turtle? I like your shell!
What is Hitler's favorite animal?
A dolphin.
What do you call a male prostitute in a bar...
Handy Andy.
Her: "Land of the free".
Me: *fat*
Her: What do you mean?
Me: It's not fat-free.
Orphan: Asks you random joke. What is the difference between my boomerang and my parents?
Me: The boomerang came back.