Whats jokes
There were these three men; their names were Shit, Shut up, and Manners. One day, they were riding in their car, and Shit fell out, so Manners went out to pick Shit up, and Shut up went to the police station.
When he got there, the police officer said, "What's your name, son?" and Shut up said, "Shut up." The officer replies with, "Ummm...excuse me?!" and Shut up said, "Shut up!" and the officer said, "Boy, where are your manners?" and Shut up said, "Round the corner picking up Shit!"
What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car?
Robin, get in the car.
What's a pedophile's favorite place to go in?
Kum and Go.
What do you call Helen Keller in a pitch black, sound proof room?
Unnecessary.
Me: Hey, what book are you reading?
Him: "The Twisted Ones."
Me: Uh, I guess that book is pretty twisted.
What kind of cigarettes does a hippie smoke?
Yours.
What does Stephen Hawking eat for breakfast? His shoulder.
What do you call a cow with 2 legs?
Lean beef.
I have 3 eyes, 2 ears, and 6 mouths, what am I?
UGLY!
What do you call a person whose heart stopped?
Dead.
What does a skeleton tile his roof with?
Shin-gles!
What did the skeleton say while riding his Harley Davidson motorcycle?
I’m bone to be wild!
What do you call a skeleton snake?
A rattler!
What do skeletons say before they begin dining?
Bone-appetit!
What? A telephone? Nah, I'm using a telebone.
What do skeletons hate the most about wind?
Nothing, it goes right through them.
What does a skeleton order at a restaurant?
Spareribs!
What's the difference between a baby and a freezer?
The freezer doesn't scream when I put my meat in it.
What do McDonald's and a priest have in common? They both put their meat in 10 year old buns.
What did the guy with two hands say to the guy with one hand?
"Hi-five!"