Whats jokes
What is the difference between a guitar and a fish?
You can't tuna fish.
What do a blackjack dealer and my uncle have in common?
They both hit me face down on the table.
Mother: We need to talk about sex...
Jason: Oh, sex, tell me what do you wanna know.
Jason had a big whooping from his mother and big spanking from his dad.
Leo: Mother, what is an idiot?
Mother: An idiot is someone that explains something in a long, boring way so that the person that the idiot is trying to explain to doesn't understand.
Mother: Do you understand?
Leo: No.
Ryan: Mother, if you had 10 cookies, and I took 4 away from you, how much do you have?
Mother: I will still have ten cookies, because I will not give any to you.
Ryan: What if I forcefully take 4 cookies away from you?
Mother: I will have 10 cookies and a dead body.
Ryan and his mother had cookies that day. Ryan took all 10 cookies. He was never seen again. R.I.P Ryan.
What's the difference between an anal and oral thermometer?
The taste.
What's your favorite place that orphans can't go to?
Home.
What do bubbles get when they’re sick?
The suds.
What’s the difference between 1000 used tires and 1000 used condoms?
One's a good year and one's a great year.
What’s the worst part about eating vegetables? Putting them back in the wheelchair.
What’s black and sits on top of the stairs?
Christopher Reeves in a house fire.
Kid: "I fucked your mom."
Orphan: "What's a mom?"
What did the fork say to the cake?
A: "I want a piece of you!"
What do you call a skunk falling from the sky?
A stink bomb!
I didn’t know what a class clown was till I went to a class and realized I was a class clown in kindergarten, and then I woke up from a nightmare.
What’s Mexico’s favorite sport?
Cross country.
What's the difference between a baby and a pizza?
One does not crow when you put it in an oven.
Mom: I was an orphan once. The kid: Oh, ok, idgaf. Mom: And you're gonna be too! :) The kid: Ok, idgaf- WAIT WHAT THE FU-
It's funny dating someone smarter than you. My girlfriend knows how to push my buttons but never takes into account what a dick I can be if need be. Let me explain. Say, for example, she calls me retarded, I remind her that she's dating me.
What's yellow and smells of Marge? Homer Simpson's fingers!