War jokes
"Why do people call Americans excessive?"
"It was probably because of WWII."
"Oh, you mean the war where America responded to the destruction of several ships and a harbor and the deaths of a little over a thousand by completely flattening two cities and killing hundreds of thousands of people?"
Why did the French call Napoleon "Napo?" Because it is Napo[leon].
How did the British lose the War of 1812?
They were out-Britshed.
Women need to be in the kitchen.
America saying they are more stupid. Russia saying they are more stupid = the stupidest war.
In the morning at 6:30 AM,
Teacher: Who fought in World War I?
Me: Trump & Biden.
Teacher: Oh ok... well good job class, see you tomorrow and study your books.
After school,
Teacher: Oh God those kids know nothing.
"She looks at her clock."
Teacher: And now I am sewed.
What do you call German weed?
Mustard Gas.
An old man walks to a busy restaurant. He tells the waiter what he wants and asks her, "Can I have a discount? I served in the war."
The waitress says, "Of course, and would you like that meal with sauce?"
"Nein," said the old man.
My grandpa died during World War II. He was the best concentration camp guard they have ever seen. RIP.
So this guy named Andrew Furda was my boyfriend for like a half a week, so five days. Then bam, I cut my hair. He only liked me for my looks, and I hoped he regrets it because it is WAR, so if you see this, you're going down, Andrew!
Why was 6 afraid of 7?
Seven’s been worried about six even since he left Afghanistan. Every time 6 closes his eyes, he sees the war and hears the gunshots. He sees the blood, the killing, the death, and soldiers falling. When he looks at seven, he remembers when they were forced to eat their own flesh to not starve in those caves. He sees the war and the flashbacks will come back forever, burned into his soul and mind.
What do you call a kid watching Star Wars by themselves?
Hans Solo.
What do you call a war dodo named Bob in WW2 and he came from Mars?
Bruno Mars.
Meaning behind the German flag: 🇩🇪 Black: culture Red: Beer Yellow: Sausage Blue: Winning world wars.
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite TV show?
Robot Wars.
My grandfather killed Hitler.
Get it? Get it?
Why did I kill?
Because I'm dumb.
Someone prank calls a general. The general hangs up and goes, "Kids these days have no respect for their elders. That's why I send them all to die."
What sounds did the Ukraine people make in basketball? Ka-boom!
What do call six gay men going in a war?
Rainbow Six Siege.