Want jokes

My brother wanted to sharpen my pencil. I told him he had a point.

Why did the orphan call her boyfriend "daddy"?

Because she wanted that D.

You really can't call Stalin bad. Just think about the people that wanted to die.

What do you call a person who wants to be punched a lot?

A clout chaser.

Search up "clout meaning" if you don't get it.

Why are they called s’mores?

Because you always want another one!

Why are a gun and a bag of chips alike?

You pull them out at school and everyone wants to be your friend.

My brother told me he wanted to find a golden apple tree in real life. I told him it was a fruitless mission.

My mom said she wanted to be a comedian when she grows up. So after she was an adult, she had kids. When they were old enough, she told them you could be whatever you want...

This isn't a joke; I just want to spread awareness of anatidaephobia.

Being bullied by an artist? Want them to leave you alone?

www.VincentVanGoghAway.com

I want a job cleaning mirrors. I could really see myself doing it!

Hot shingles in your neighborhood wanting to get nailed.

No one wanted to hear my ocean puns, they said they were too fishy.

Do you want to hear a joke about the blunt pencil? Never mind, it's pointless.

If a physically handicapped gay white male is sitting on the toilet in the handicapped stall, and if you are a gay white male that is well-endowed that is not physically handicapped, and if you want the physically handicapped gay white male who is sitting on the toilet in the handicapped stall to suck your dick, what do you do to convince him to suck your dick if you have a hard on and your horny as hell?

Put $25.00 under the handicapped stall before you put your dick under the handicapped stall.

A Story:

I lived in a small house. Behind my house was a big forest. If I went in the forest, then I heard scary sounds. That was very dreadful. I had a son. He was 9 years old. One day he went into the forest and did not come back. I called the police, but it couldn't help. I went looking. I really wanted my son Robby back. I missed him so! With a flashlight and compass, I went into the dark, eerie forest. Then the noises came again, but this time I also heard a scream. A scream from a nine year old child. It was Robby, certainly! I stopped in front of a tunnel.

Sequel follows...

Two pedophiles meet each other. Then one asks if he wanted to trade "2 of 5" for "1 of 10?"

A teacher asks her class, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” Little Johnny says “I wanna be a billionaire, going to the most expensive clubs, take the best b*tch with me, give her a Ferrari worth over a million bucks, an apartment in Hawaii, a mansion in Paris, a jet to travel through Europe, an Infinite Visa Card and to make love to her three times a day.”

The teacher, shocked, and not knowing what to do with the bad behavior of the child, decides not to give importance to what he said and then continues the lesson. “And you, Susie?” the teacher asks. Susie says “I wanna be Johnny’s b*tch.”

Are you a school? Because I want to shoot kids inside you.

Are you a train? Because I want you to run over me. :)