Want jokes
Who wants to hear the biggest joke ever?
My life.
A Down syndrome kid asks for an ice cream. The man asks, "Do you want sauce on it?"
The kid says, "It doesn’t matter, I’m going to drop it anyway!" 😂😂😂
A Roman walks into a bar and orders a martinus. The bartender says, "Don't you mean a Martini?" The Roman then says, "Look, if I want a double, I'll ask for one."
I want to die like my grandpa, with a blindfold and a wet sponge on his head.
An American is touring the Soviet Union. A Russian takes him to a school so he can see what it's like. He asks the kids if they like the Soviet Union. All of the kids say yes, they love it. All but one. That kid bursts out crying. The American asks what's wrong, and he cries, "I want to live in the Soviet Union!"
Why did the cow not want to talk to the other cow? Because they had beef with each other.
Pep called; they want their unpadded bra back.
What's the difference between a blonde and your computer?
You don't want your computer to go down on you.
I don't want to taco about myself.
Want to hear an inside joke? I walked into a house. Want to hear an outside joke? I walked out of that house.
A man had moved to a new country with his dog and with basic understanding of the language. One day he heard people talking about a place for dogs, so he took his dog there, telling them he wanted his dog to be groomed.
The man behind the counter responded with "yes happy dog, come back in little hours." So the man left and came back a couple hours later. When he asked about his dog, he was given a box of jerky. He found out "Happy Dog" was the name of the place where dogs become food.
You can say what you want about deaf people...
Seriously, who wants dicks?
Why did the electron leave the atom?
Because it wanted to be Argon.
There were 15 ugly guys on a bus. The bus crashed, and they all went to heaven.
God took pity on them and told the ugly dudes they could have one wish. The first guy said, "I want to be handsome." God granted his wish. The second guy said, "I want to be more handsome than the first guy." God granted his wish. The third guy said, "I want to be more handsome than the second guy." God granted his wish, and this continued on and on until the 15th ugly guy. The ugly guy was laughing, really hard. "What is your wish?" God asked him. "I WANT ALL THESE GUYS UGLY AGAIN!!!!!" God granted his wish.
If you want to see my foes, bring a shovel and bring a map and a getaway car just in case we get caught.
What does Christian say when he wants out of jail?
"Bale me out!"
Want to hear a racist joke?
Donald Trump.
You wanna know what I want for Christmas? My dad to come back with the milk he said he was gonna get.
Q: Why did the family want to move out while the neighbors were playing tennis?
A: Because they were a racquet!