Violence

Violence jokes

Weapon

  • Why do most clips for automatic weapons have 32 bullets?

    That's usually how many kids are in a classroom.

    Hooker

  • How many dead hookers does it take to change a light bulb?

    Definitely not 13, because my basement is still dark.

    Shotgun

  • A man walks into a bar and says, "I'm feeling depressed. What do you have to cheer me up?"

    The bartender replied: "A shotgun."

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  • Heart

  • They say the surest way to a man’s heart is through the stomach. But, I find going through the ribcage a lot easier.

    Fight

  • Two friends fighting.

    Friend 3: "Cut it out, you two!"

    Friend 4: "It wouldn't help if they cut it out... Believe me... I've tried..."

    Gun

  • I am armed with an automatic 4-OXD 22. caliber machine gun. HANDS IN THE AIR!

    Suicide

  • Suicide really isn't something to joke about, unless it's hanging yourself.

    It's a really quicker way to die, and less blood spilled for your mother to clean up.

    School shooting

  • *School shooting happens.*

    Foreign exchange student: *Sobbing under desk.*

    American student: "First time?"

    Foreign exchange student: "Yeah, you?"

    American student: "Hahaha. No, not my first time."

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