Dad: I'll pay you 10 bucks for every day you don't tell a lie.
Next day:
Dad: Son, what's the ugliest thing you've ever seen?
Son: That ugly face of yours, go get a life, gosh, Dad, you're embarrassing.
The dad sulked for 3 whole years.
Proof that words really can hurt.
What do you call someone who hates rape jokes? An ugly feminist that couldn't get a cock in her mouth.
You're so ugly you make the blind kids cry šš
My friend is so ugly, she got surgery twice, but not even that could fix her.
When you were born, you were so ugly that the doctors slapped your parents!
Me: Are you an alien?
Friend: No.
Me: Yeah, because you're too ugly to be one.
Iām back and have a joke my friend said!
Person 1: My brother's Halloween costume is so ugly.
Person 2: What was it?
Person 1: He went as himself.
Yo momma so ugly the Devil started going to church
Yo mama so ugly, when Santa saw her, he said, "Ho, ho, hole shit!"
Your mom is so ugly her face would split in half when she sees you.
Jantje goes on a walk with his grandmother. Jantje sees 1 dollar on the street and picks it up.
The grandmother says: "Hey, Jantje! No picking up things from the floor! They are ugly and bad!"
Then they keep walking. The grandmother slips and asks Jantje to help her stand up. Jantje answers: "No! Everything on the ground is ugly and bad."
Why do orphans watch "The Nightmare Before Christmas"?
Answer: Oogie Boogie is ugly, so they want to be ugly.
What am I if my neck is covered in red bumps, my ears are the size of a giant corn cob, my skin is ruby red, my eyes are bloodshot, I have green skin, and fur growing all over my body? Horribly ugly.
My family is like an apple tree. My sister is that ugly one that has to rot in.
Your mom is so small that she can fit in the luggage.
Yo mama so fat she canāt even fit in the suitcase
Yo mama so fat, thatās why people donāt want to marry her, except for fat guys.
Your mama so fat thatās why Hulk gets big.
Yo mama so fat that the Avengers team had to snap five times and say, "Oh my God!"
What do you say to a ugly girl who claims to have been raped?
āAre you sure you didnāt rape him?ā
