Try jokes
I tried to make a website for orphans.
Sadly, I couldn't make a home page.
Why don't orphans play GTA?
Because they're sad they don't get wanted!
Why did the skeleton not tell jokes? It lost its funny bone. Maybe you should try putting it back.
Yo mama so fat that when Thanos tried to snap her out of the world, he couldn't do it, so instead, he clapped her out of the world.
Have you ever tried sex when camping?
It's f***ing intense.
Yo mama so stupid that when the mirror cracked, she tried to order another one.
What's harder than taking a shit?
Trying to take a shit while constipated!
The lettuce and tomato were in a race. The lettuce was a head and the tomato was trying to ketchup.
Why did Sally get a black eye?
She tried to play patty cake!
Yo momma is so ugly, when she tried to join the ugly contest, they said, "Sorry, no professionals!"
So, once upon a time, there was a man who lived in his house with his wife.
He got up to go out to work and closed the front door behind him.
Not even four seconds later, he came back inside panicking, saying, "There's a rabbit with a gun outside!"
The wife replied, "Oh, don't worry, rabbits don't have guns. They can't shoot people; you must be imagining things."
The man calmed down for a few minutes, and after some reassuring, he eventually decided to try to go back out to work again.
So he stepped outside the front door, and the rabbit shot him.
The real reason Steven Hawking died is he was drunk and tried to go down a flight of stairs.
The only problem being short and gay is that whenever I try to tell people I'm top in my relationship, they don't believe me because I'm shorter than the person I'm dating, like, WTF?
Lenda: Hey, can you help me with my homework, please?!
Genda: Okay, and if I do, you won't make a fuss about it!
Lenda: I'll try!
3 mins later.
Genda: THAT IS NOT THE RIGHT ANSWER!
Lenda: Then what is 90 million?
Genda: WHA WHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Lenda mocking her: WHA OH YEAH YOU ARE A TERRIBLE TUTOR!!!!!!!!
4 mins later.
Genda: What is the capitol of watchington?
Lenda: Uh.....Idaho!
Genda being sarcastic: Yes...it is not the capitol of watchington...BECAUSE IT IS A STATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Lenda: Oh, you mean Iowa!
Genda: UHHHHHHHHHHHH CUSS WORD!!!!!!!!!!
Lenda: U can't help that I'm the smart one...okay sweetie now you go be dumb and I go be smart! LATER SISTER! Oh wait, can you help me with my homework?
Genda: NO! You the smart one so you do it!
Three friends were stuck in the desert. They were struggling and trying to find food when they found a magical lamp. They rubbed it and out came a genie, and the genie says, "Each of you friends get to have one wish." So the first friend said, "I wish to go home," same as the second one. The third friend said, "I'm lonely. I wish my friends were with me!"
I miss the good old days when you could have a light joke at someone else's expense. Like doing that marital rape thing, it never used to be called that. It used to be called "serving your husband" or "wifely duties". The real joke is that it was legal until 1990.
Why is that a joke?
Because it is piss funny seeing the look on her face when she wakes up in the middle of coitus.
Why is that a joke?
Dude, come on, you want to start your day off happy or not?
Why is that a joke?
She literally looks like she just seen a ghost and sort of flops about trying to fend you off like a rag doll. It's piss funny.
No seriously, dude, why is that a joke? It sounds more like a felony.
You're so hot when your girlfriend tries to suck your cock, it burns her mouth.
Okay, who the heck is watersharky? He just tries to "help" people, and he just posts stupid songs because he acts like he is depressed.
The reason why Stephen Hawking died is because he tried to overclock his wheelchair.
Spongebob: Easy now, you try first. Get a jar.
Patrick: *picks up nuke*
Spongebob: Patrick, that's a nuke!
Patrick: Yes.
Nuke: *boom*