Tree jokes
How much wood could a woodchuck chuck?
If a woodchuck could chuck wood?
As much wood as a woodchuck could chuck,
If a woodchuck could chuck wood.
Person: What's your perfect date look like?
Me: Oh, just hanging around in a tree.
What did one tree say to another in a crisis? Don't leaf me when things get bad.
I don't trust trees...they look shady.
Well, tell her that Halloween is the best holiday because you can hide Easter eggs under the Christmas tree while eating a big Thanksgiving turkey.
What do you call an Indian man stuck in a tree?
A leaf.
What falls first from a tree, an apple or an emo?
The apple... the emo just hangs there.
Q: What season can an orphan see their family tree?
A: Fall.
If you don't get it, in the fall trees have no leaves, there [are] just empty branches, like an orphan's tree.
"I love you, you too. I-eeeeeee was the night. Time is it when you you get a typical sleep night. Is oooooooo, is it a walk home was the night night and a tree is it?"
What do you call Tarzan when he swings through the trees backwards?
Nazrat.
What is the difference between a human and a tree and a house? Is for dinner today after school today after I have school 🏫 I have for kids dinner 🍴 was that I had dinner 🍴 night night dinner 🍴 night is what time it when we went and get the dog 🐶 night and dinner 🍴 night I love 💕 it is the one ☝️ I did not have time today.
A lumberjack goes to a person's house.
Then he realized the tree was too big and was stumped and had to leaf.
Q: What did one koala say to the other? A: How's it hanging? 😂
Somewhere out there, a tree is tirelessly producing oxygen for BLESSEDBRIAN. I think he owes it an apology.
When they say you live by the sword, you die by the sword, not in Paul Walker's case. He lived by the car, died by a tree. Well, I guess the car was stumped.
What's the difference between leafmen and leafwomen? Palm trees.
What did Dom Toretto say about the tree Paul Walker hit?
"Family strong, but not that strong."
Once when I was 6, I had a massive crush on a girl in my grade. She liked me too, and we kissed under a tree.
Next day, same spot, but now she's pregnant. That stupid dad stole my girl!
What do a priest and Christmas tree lights have in common?
They can both flash.
How did the Apple and the emo fall off the tree at the same time?
Because Paul Walker crashed into it.