Tragedy jokes
What do an ice cream cone and a Ukrainian orphanage have in common?
Children scream when they melt.
I'll always remember my Dad's last words before he died on 9/11...
Allahu Akbar!
When I was a kid, I used to read a lot. I mainly grew up reading stories by Shakespeare, especially the story Romeo & Juliet. That one in particular taught me a valuable life lesson. It taught me to not be surprised when my girlfriend killed herself.
What's the best comeback for a person calling you an orphan?
Kill their parents.
Where did Kobe go after the helicopter crashed? Everywhere.
What does Jeffrey Dahmer and Travis Scott have in common?
Eight dead people.
I feel bad for the guy in 9/11 who ordered a salami pizza. Instead, he just got a plane.
There are a lot of things that explode... like cars, boats, the Twin Towers.
Fat people are like the Twin Towers. Once they go down, they don’t come back up.
What do planes and offices have in common?
They both tend to cross paths at the wake of disaster.
My favorite place to make a bonfire? Orphanages, of course, silly!
What's the difference between your birth and 9/11?
One was planned.
My grandma always said, "Slow and steady wins the race."
She died in a fire.
The other day I went to a museum. My friend and I went to the Holocaust section, and he got choked up when he saw the Anne Frank picture. I asked him, "Why are you sad? It's just an ashtray."
When was the biggest BBQ in history? Hiroshima, August 6, 1945.
There was a little kid crying in the park today. I asked him where his parents were. Now I realize, man, I love my job.
What's an orphan's least favorite movie?
Home.
We sped up the cycle of life and death, we gave Eric and Dylan a shortcut.
What’s an orphan's favorite Marvel film?
Spider-Man: Far From Home.
Suicide isn't a joke. It's called "parkour gone wrong."