Worst Jokes Ever
What's the fastest way to break up a bingo game in Baghdad?
You shout out, "B-52!"
My lesbian friends bought me a gold timepiece for my birthday.
But, I think they got confused when I said, "I wanna watch!"
What do you call a terrorist attack in Iraq? A selfie!
Did you know that good Catholic girls like to WAP?
Yeah, they are all about Worship and Prayer.
Did you know Kurt had dandruff?
Found his head and shoulders behind the couch.
What is Michael Jackson's favorite movie?
The Boy in the Plastic Bubble? Why? The boy who was in the bubble.
What does Michael Jackson say when he grabs his crotch? I never noticed that before.
I asked for emotional support. They handed me a mirror and said, "Talk to someone who cares."
What do you call two Chinese lesbians?
Two can't chew.
Michael Jackson was the King of Pop until he got burned by Pepsi. Now, Pepsi is the hero, and now, we know the rest of the story.
What does Michael Jackson say when he gets hard? Ow!
Why was Helen Keller so bad at driving?
Because she's a woman.
What do you call a black man in the army in camo? Incogneggo.
I’d pound your mom so fast, even Sonic would get jealous!
My girlfriend's sister told me to write her a poem. This is what I came up with:
roses are red, violets are blue, if you ever feel alone, I'm always watching you.
For centuries the Catholic Church censored everything that wouldn‘t fit with their teachings. You know what I call that?
"Chancel culture!"
Why did Sally fall off the swing?
Because she had no arms.
Knock, knock.
Not Sally.
The media's relationship with Hillary is just like Bill's relationship with Hillary. The relationship is unwanted and forced, and they'll move on to the next person any chance they get.
What is the difference between an illegal immigrant and a book?
A book has papers.
Yo mama so fat, when she sits down she dislocates Earth out of its orbit.