Worst Jokes Ever
A Scouser at ground zero just after the twin towers fell asks a passer-by, "What time is it, mate?"
An American replies, "That's a mad accent, where are you from?"
The Scouser says, "Liverpool."
The American says, "Oh, what state is that in?"
The Scouser looks around and says, "About the same state as this, mate, but what time is it?"
What part of a vegetable can't you eat? The wheelchair.
One day, a little girl was texting her friend. "Guess what, Angelica!" said the little girl.
"What?" Angelica replied.
"I'm a guy."
You are so fat that when you wear a yellow raincoat, a running person behind you shouted, "Taxi!"
What do emos and ninjas both have in common? They both hide and cut things.
"Suicide bomber kills 44 people in Pakistan mosque." Damn, that's a crazy K/D. He must be hacking.
Why is an orphan bad at tennis?
'Cause he couldn't get any love.
Your hairline goes so far back that even your mom couldn’t see it.
You: Bro, this school picture is soooo ugly!! (Points to yours).
Me: Bruh, you just typed up mirror!
I once was playing with my friend and Roblox girlfriend, then one day, they cheated on me. I broke up with her and unfriended him, then I saw my mom and my uncle crying!
Me be like: ;-;
Why can’t an orphan play baseball?
They can’t run to home.
My dad is now a milkman.
Now I have over 50 brothers and sisters.
What does Buzz Lightyear and an orphan's parents have in common?
They go to infinity and beyond.
What's the difference between a blind person and an orphan?
They both can't see their parents.
Two balls sit inside a bucket. One turned to another and said, "Hey man, boing, are you sentient, too?"
The other one said, "I’m sapient, you are sentient!"
BOINGZINGA!?!
Your hairline is like Quandel Dingle, it's so goofy!
Once I asked Siri to tell me a joke, and it asked me, "What is the difference between a large pizza and you?" One can feed a family.
I got a toaster for my birthday and said, "Yay, new bath bomb!"
What did the tree say to the emo kid? Wanna hang?
Parent: My parents never attended my birthdays.
Birthday girl: Oh wow!
Parent: Anyone missing?
Birthday girl: Your parents.