Worst Jokes Ever
What's the difference between Monday and a dick?
They're not different. They're both unnecessarily long and hard.
You think on a airplane when a muslim guy gets on, people look at him and think... "Aw, fuck."
What kind of air does Ariana breathe?
Helium?
What did one emo kid say to the other?
"I like ya cut, G."
What do genders and the Twin Towers have in common?
There used to be two, but now it's a touchy subject.
Your mama is so stupid that she put a ruler under her pillow to see how long she slept.
Are you French? Because I Eiffel for you.
What do you call it when Panera Bread gets painted red?
Panera Red.
Your forehead is so big that it said, "To be continued."
What’s the difference between an orphan and Pikachu?
Pikachu, I choose you!
Do you know Imagine Dragons? Imagine dragon these nuts across your face!
How many white women does it take to change a lightbulb?
One. To hire the Mexicans.
Q: What do the mob and pussy have in common?
A: One slip of the tongue and you're in deep shit.
What does the "f" in "orphan" stand for? It stands for family.
Hi, I'm Saul Goodman. Did you know that you have rights? The Constitution says you do, and so do I. I believe that until proven guilty, every man, woman, and child in this country is innocent, and that's why I fight for you, Albuquerque!
What's the difference between Putin and Hitler? I don’t know, you tell me.
There's this smart way to sneak a calculator into school. I've heard of it. You take the calculator, put it in a gun magazine, put the magazine in the gun, and bring the gun to school!
What do high school kids and Dow have in common? They both test chemicals.
What's Michael Jackson's nickname?
Nivea black and white.
Why did the chiropractor go to jail? For not paying $75 in back taxes.