Worst Jokes Ever
Twin Towers? No plane, plane targets.
What does my family and the Twin Towers have in common? We both played Jenga.
What is the difference between orphans and serial killers?
Serial killers are wanted.
What do you call a Mexican who's lost his car?
Carlos.
What you call suicide, I call a failed speedrun attempt.
"I'm sorry, Wendy, but I don't trust anything that bleeds for five days and doesn't die."
Two terrorists walk into a bar, and the bartender says, "What can I get you?"
The terrorists both say, "A beer."
The bartender overhears them talking about how they will kill 300 people and a donkey. The bartender says, "Why a donkey?"
One terrorist says, "See, I told you no one would care about the people!"
When you suffer from depression and someone tells you to just cheer up, god damn, why didn't I think of that?
I have a fear of speed bumps, but I'm getting over it.
What's the biggest problem with gravity?
It keeps putting people down.
Why do orphans have gross cakes?
Because their dad didn't come home with the milk.
What do you call a deer who is funny?
Diraleous.
Yo, Bloon... what bitch where the fuck my child support camo Bloon? 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
How do you get a depressed person out of a tree?
You cut the rope.
Q: Why do orphans get on Facebook?
A: Because they get liked.
There was once a Spanish magician. He said, "Uno, dos..." and he disappeared without a tres.
A husband came back from a business trip and found out that his wife was pregnant. At first, he got a bit suspicious, but then he just ignored it and hugged his wife with happiness. The second when he met his friend and told him the news, the friend just said, "Wait, what? I thought she was on pills!"
Yo momma so fat that she don't need a backpack. She keeps her things in her Lagrangian points.
So, my son is into astronomy, and he asked how stars die. I said, "Usually overdose."
Where do spiders commit crimes?
The Dark Web.