Worst Jokes Ever
Why was it cold in Stephen Hawking's house?
Because he had a new window open...
Where can you find the freshest vegetables? A school for the disabled!
What's Hitler's favorite Yu-Gi-Oh card?
BLUE EYES WHITE DRAGON
Dark humour : hell!!! Aren't people racist!!!
How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends how hard you throw them.
Your fat!
What's Stephen Hawking's favorite food?
His shoulder.
Yo mama so fat! When she jumps into a pool, NASA found water on Mars!
What's the difference between a white kid and a computer?
The child has no trouble shooting.
How do fish get to school?
On a octobus.
Lol.
What do you call it when Batman skips church?
Christian Bale.
A blondie and a redneck jumped off a building. Which one will land first?
The redneck because the blonde will ask for directions.
What is similar about a dog and a woman? You can ask them to come.
A guy sits at a bar in a skyscraper restaurant high above the city. He slams a shot of tequila, goes over to the window, and jumps out.
The guy sitting next to him canât believe what he just saw. Heâs more surprised when, 10 minutes later, the same guy walks back into the bar and sits down next to him.
The astonished onlooker asks, âHow did you do that? I just saw you jump out the window, and weâre hundreds of feet above the ground!â
The jumper responds by slurring, âWell, I donât get it either. I slam a shot of tequila, and when I jump out the window, the tequila makes me slow down right before I hit the ground. Watch.â He takes a shot, goes to the window, and jumps out.
The other guy runs to the window and watches as the guy falls to just above the sidewalk, slows down, and lands softly on his feet. A few minutes later, the jumper walks back into the bar.
The other guy has to try it, too, so he orders a shot of tequila. He slams it and jumps out the window. As he reaches the bottom, he doesnât slow down at all. SPLAT!
The first guy orders another shot of tequila. The bartender shakes his head. âYouâre really an a**hole when youâre drunk, Superman.â I know.
What's a person with Down syndrome's favorite detergent?
Downy.
They say nothing is impossible, but I've been doing nothing all day.
Why was 4 not impressed when 5 won a prize for 6?
Because 511472.
What do you get when you cross a redneck and another redneck?
Incest.
What kind of file turns a 1.5 cm hole into a 4.5 cm hole?
A pedophile.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Crippling depression.
Crippling depression who--?
Me.