Worst Jokes Ever

My and my penis never truly understood the words "Booby traps" until we met the ex-wife. God's gift of self-will was working fine until my penis went hard and my mind went blank, and God started laughing, and I swear I heard him say, "Booby trap" as he walked away! True story.

Friend, your mum's fat.

Me: Well, your mum's so fat, she played pool with the planets.

What does a pillow say when you live for a week? "Don't forget me!"

This joke is about koala bears. It is high koala-ty.

What do you call a magic car that I can do to help me out for you and I will be doing a great day?

Why did the toilet paper not make it across the street?

'Cause it got stuck in a pothole!

What time is it when you get home? Can you walk, walk home? Was your night night? You had fun? I had dinner, night time, and a tree. I had dinner. Is it a magic time? Dinner! I have been home. Was good.

This is mean af. Y'all need to stop this. Like, what the f *ck? What would happen if you all grew up and you were like this? Like, damn.

What do sheep hate?

Their enemies: goats!

What do you call a cat 🐈 that is glued down? A big cluck.

Africa spelled backwards is Acirfa, which means absolutely nothing. But Acirfa spelled backwards is Africa, which is a word.

Good news! There's a new program to help autistic people. It's called Action T-4.

Perfect dinner joke.

Did you hear about the new movie, "Constipated?"

It hasn’t come out yet.

The best part of you ran down your mother's leg... Einstein got ready to climax while doing math but realized you can't cumtilyain cumtilion. It's after sucktillion fucktillion.

Son: I love you, Dad.

Dad gets in car and drives away.

Why didn’t the orphan celebrate their birthday?

Because they didn’t have a mom to birth them.

What is the difference between a human and a magic house?

To the Earth, is the human body of the human being human? Is it human? Human can be the one day today after the night is the snow time and a.

This is crazy! Little Johnny died!

Isabell Leal is ugly as f*ck.

Why can't orphans play soccer?

They can't kick.