Worst Jokes Ever
Cool kid: I slept with your sister.
Me: Never knew my brother was a girl.
Everyone else: :O
What’s the difference between a prostitute and a drug dealer?
The prostitute can wash her “crack” and sell it again.
Science gets you to the moon.
Religion flies you into buildings.
Why does Helen Keller look in the toilet after taking a poop?
Nobody knows!
What name is easy to say in Spanish?
Marissa!
What is the difference between a house and a car? A car can drive and a house can not drive.
Why doesn’t Chuck Norris flush the toilet?
He doesn’t have to, he scares the shit out of the toilet.
What's black, white, and red all over?
Lossvagus school shooting.
Why was the baseball player stuck in the stadium?
'Cause he made his home run.
How do you know when German people break into your house? When you can not find your bed.
What is mail? Boring.
What has a magic car? A magic dog.
Why do any orphans have sex?
Because they can't call anyone "daddy."
Why can’t blind people read this?
They can’t see.
How did the rape victim on a diet lose 21 grams?
She died.
If Selena Gomez wasn't really single after Justin Bieber dumped her, I would wait for her to come by my house, take her fine ass in my room, close my door, and give her some sex medicine until she masturbates.
I like my vegetables like I like my women: forgotten at the bottom of my freezer.
What do autistics, women, and chinks have in common? They can't fuckin' drive.
Why did the octopus cross the road?
To get to the douchebag's house.
Knock knock.
(It's the octopus.)
Stop saying "cheetah cheater" jokes. They suck!