Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

You know how we all have different sides? Well, I have a suicidal side. (Here a bang in the next room.) Oh well, not anymore :)

"Brown bear, brown bear, what do you see?" I see a blind man looking at me.

"Blind man, blind man, what do you see?"

Oh sorry, I forgot you can't see.

How many redheads does it take to change a lightbulb?

One! She holds the bulb and the world revolves around her.

The best part about having autism is being able to make jokes about genociding autistic people and no one can say a damn thing.

How did the priest know the nun was on her period? He tasted blood on the altar boy's cock.

There is this fish, and this fish thinks if that fly drops 6 inches, I’m gonna jump out the water and eat that fucking fish!

Then there is a bear, he thinks if that fly drops six inches, that fish jumps up - I’m gonna run out there and eat that fucking fish!

This huntsman also thinks to himself 🧐 if that fly drops six inches, fish jumps up, bear runs out, eats the fish. I’m gonna shoot that fucking bear.

Unbelievably there is a tiny little brave mouse, who also thinks to himself 🧐 if that fly drops six inches, fish jumps, bear runs, huntsman shoots,

He’s bound to drop that cheese sandwich in his back pocket!!!!

I’m gonna eat that fucking cheese sandwich!!

Meanwhile...

there’s This cat!!!’ He sees what’s going on - if they fly drops six inches -the fish =bear =huntsman =mouse eating the cheese sarnie....

Easy pickings...

Anyway bang 💥 the fly drops six inches. Fish jumps up. Bear grabs the fish. Huntsman shoots the fucking bear,

DROPS HIS CHEESE SARNIE!!

Cat runs after mouse trying to get the cheese sarnie

The cat slips over him (stacks it) cat falls in the river...

LONG STORY I KNOW BUT THE MORAL OF THE STORY IS...

every time a fly drops six inches a pussy get wet)

WALLOP... try remembering all that in A pub pissed. Xx

Welcome to Antonio’s pizza and abortion, where yesterday’s loss is today’s sauce!

Sending gay men to prison makes no sense to me. I mean, you have sex with a man and then they lock you up with a bunch of other men.

That would be like arresting someone for drunk driving and forcing them to become a bartender.

Why did the rape victim stop eating pears?

Because she was told that if you rearrange the letters "PEAR," it spells "rape."

What is a difference between a tree and a car? A car 🚙 can drive and [a] tree 🌲 can not drive.