Toilet jokes

Why was the toilet angry?

Because everyone was pooping in his mouth :>

Your mama is so ugly, she doesn't have to flush the toilet. She already scared the shit out of it.

Do you see the toilet?

Toilet: hi You: hi what?

Your forehead is so big, when you go to the toilet, it bends. You stooped.

My boyfriend and I were playing baseball last night with some of our friends. Halfway through the game we took a break and he asked me to hold his balls for him whilst he went to the toilet.

All our friends were shocked when I went into the boys' bathroom with him.

Why are orphans always on the toilet?

Because they don't have anyone to give them some toilet paper!

Why can't orphans go on vacation?

The last time they did, they fell in the toilet and had no one to help them out. Ugh!

POOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOP!

Toothbrush: I think I have the worst job ever.

Toilet paper: Ya, right.

Le fish de la toilette.

[Plays french music]

Have you read "50 Yards to the Outhouse" by Willie Makeit and Probly Not?

Hi, this is a good prank I did.

So, my brother LOVES his phone and so... I put it in the toilet and then flushed it, but it wouldn't go down. So, then I gave it to him and he threw it and then it broke. HAHAHAHAHAHA

(Prankster, tell me if you don't like me doing pranks because it is your thing.)

Bye guys! I hope you liked this prank! (And his phone did not really break, it just cracked really bad lol)

Me: Hey, have you seen my butt?

Him: No, have you seen where it is?

Me: Maybe here on your private part hehe.

Him: *dumps my head on the toilet* HAVE YOU SEEN YOUR ASS NOW, PERVERT?

POO I LOVE POO.

Here’s my song:

“Poo poo poo pooo pooe poop poop poopy.”

Thank you!

A butt saw the toilet and said, "Shit, I'm sick!"

Me: I broke me bum.

Dad: Oh, that is bad. I will get some Pooh in the toilet so I can heal your bum.

Poopy face, poopy face, poopy poopy poopy face!

What happens when a guy is in a pool with a deck and no one is around? The guy has to pee, get up on the deck, and stick it between the bars and pee.

Little Brown Bear (LBB): Why did Santa take the kitty and all of my toys, Mummy?

His mom: Maybe because you're the second most massive shit stain besides Caillou.

*Krampus comes down the chimney to eat LBB*

Krampus: Should’ve been better, Little Bear.

LBB: Help, Mummy! He’s the Scratchy monster!

Shrek: Just kidding, it’s not Krampus, but indeed me and Black Donkey instead, and we’re going to poop on your floor.

Duggie: Hopefully Marvin doesn’t see us, and by the way, want some purplish Kool-Aid?