They jokes
What do Monica and Bill Clinton have in common? They both did not inhale. Lol.
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
Because they can't find home! šš¤£
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
Because they can't find home plate.
Some moving men had just begun their day's work.
The first thing they brought into the house was a huge couch.
The owner came in and asked how everything was going. They replied, "Sofa so good."
Why canāt orphans celebrate Christmas?
Because they have no family.
Memes
In the new Grinch, the Whos would say he stole Christmas, "Get him!" Then the Grinch said, "I'm an orphan!" That changes everything. The Whos said, "What would they do if Max was an orphan?"
What is the difference between an American and an orphan?
They don't have a home to get their guns.
What do pigs and ink have in common?
They both go in a pen.
They struggled to lift the weights, but I got watermelon to keep me in shape.
Have they tried switching him off and on again?
Yo mama is so slow, when she stepped on the highway they had to order a crane to come move her from starting traffic.
Technoblade says, "Punch an orphan. What are they gonna do, tell their parents?"
What's the difference between men and pigs? Pigs don't turn into men when they drink.
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They don't know where the home is.
Also, what do you call an orphan taking a selfie?
A family photo.
Why don't churches have Wi-Fi?
They don't want to compete with an invisible power that actually works.
What's Michael Jackson got in common with Santa?
They both empty their sacks around children.
So, I am an emo dude, so I sit in the back of the class, and I talk to no one.
But one day this dude came up to me and tried to talk to me, so I just ignored him. Then he got really pissed off and said, "I'm gonna kill you." I was like, "You're gonna kill me just because I ignored you? Is your ego that big, wow?" He left. Then the next day he brought his goons with him and said, "Now you're dead." I ignored him again, and he said, "You will pay for this."
So the following day after school I was walking down the street back to my house. Then he and his goons tried to attack me, but then they died, so I kept on walking. I had some rope traps set.
This was the best day of my life.
This is why you never mess with emos. We have ropes everywhere.
A man is sitting in a chair. He is talking to the other friend about what they must cherish.
One says he cherishes his family, the other cherishes his parents, and a man comes in, points at the chair and says, āI CHAIRish my Chairā as he pulls up a chair.
A woman has twins and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named "Ahmal." The other goes to a family in Spain; they name him "Juan." Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his birth mother. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wishes she also had a picture of Ahmal.
Her husband responds, "They're twins! If you've seen Juan, you've seen Ahmal."
*Breaking News!* - Apparently the first person in Melbourne has died because of the Coronavirus. In his house they found 1000 cans of food, 50 kilos of pasta, 80 kilos of rice, 300 toilet rolls and 50L of hand sanitiser which he had panic purchased from the supermarket and stockpiled "just in case".
The whole lot collapsed and buried him.