They jokes
They told me Avengers: Endgame was going to be 3 hours long, but honestly? I felt like it was over in a SNAP!
Have you heard about the new cereal?
It's called "Prostituties."
They don't snap, crackle, or pop, but they sure do bang!
Why did the orphan go to church?
So that they had someone to call father.
Why can't an orphan play baseball?
Because they can't find home.
Why did the child drop their ice cream?
They got hit by a bus.
What does a bullet and milk have in common? They both take out your dad.
They say making and having friends comes with some benefits. I guess you could say I have friends with benefits.
Why can’t orphans pick up their phone after school?
Because they need their parents to go pick it up.
Why do orphans use iPhone X's?
Because they can't find home.
Two men walk into a bar, no clue how they didn't see it.
Yo mama is so old that when she was in history class as a kid, all they learned about was themselves!
Alcoholics don't run in my family, they drive.
I saw two blind men fighting at the mall. I yelled, "He has a gun!" They both ran.
I asked for emotional support. They handed me a mirror and said, "Talk to someone who cares."
They say there is strength in numbers. Tell that to the people in the World Trade Center.
What do orgasms and pulses have in common?
I don’t care if they have either of them.
Why can you never surprise mountains?
They peak.
What does a gay guy and an ambulance have in common?
They both get loaded from the rear and go...woo woo woo.
What does a cop say when they shoot ginger?
"Orange is the new black."
Why aren’t Make-A-Wish kids allowed to fly?
Because they rarely make it out of the terminal.