They jokes
Why do emo kids not like trees? They always leave them hanging.
Why don’t Indians play soccer?
Cos every time they get a corner, they open a shop.
Q: Why do orphans like boomerangs?
A: They come back, unlike their parents.
Why don't cannibals eat clowns?
Because they taste funny.
This one time I said to a person that they are dry, then I was wet (ba dum tiss).
My bully said I have to shut up. I said, "Shut down" (ba dum tiss).
Pedophiles are fucking immature assholes.
Not done yet.
Now they are.
I once saw an orphan... I decided to ask them a simple question... "Hey! Where is your family?"
They didn't reply.
I kept asking them. They started crying. I started laughing. They ran away...
You know how sometimes you want to listen to music?
But everything you listen to is just supremely unsatisfying, even if it's songs you usually love; they are just so unappealing, and you have no idea what you actually want to listen to.
Orphan: *crying* You: Do you know where your parents are? Orphan: No. Your Friend: They don't have parents!!! You: 😂 I know.
Why are orphans bad at baseball?
Because they don’t know what a home is.
Did you know an orphan is deeply religious because they can finally call someone "father."
Twin Towers ordered Little Caesars but they got jets.
Whenever you're mad, just punch an orphan. What are they gonna do? Tell their parents?
How are Xbox servers like hookers? First they take my money, and then they go down on me.
In a thick Russian accent:
"Let's buy some vodka, pollute the earth with oil, and make insecure nuclear power plants that break all the time! Ah, yes. The mother land. A great place to be. Not like those stupid Ukrainian people who are living happy lives, they are crazy and need to die."
Why can’t orphans play sports?
Because they don’t have a home team.
So, I was getting on a plane, and the pilot does his usual speech talking about altitude and what not with the microphone, and he forgets to turn it off, so after the speech I heard him and the co-pilot talking about what they were doing after work, and whatnot.
Then the pilot said he was dying for a blowjob and a coffee, so a stewardess ran to the pilots cabin, and then left about 15 minutes later, and the pilot shouted "Next time don't forget the coffee!"
Why do orphans go to church?
So they finally have someone to call father.
A mom and her son are taking a walk when they pass a homeless man fapping. The boy asks, "What is that man doing?" The mom says, "Making pizza," trying to turn him away.
The son sees a dog fucking another dog and he asks the same thing. She says, "Making extra cheese." When they pass a window and see a couple doing it, he asks the same thing. She says, "Ordering the pizza."
Later that day, the mother says to the father, "I think I want to order some pizza with extra cheese tonight, don't know why that sounds good."
So that night, the husband who was watching tv yelled up the stairs, "Wanna order some pizza!?"
The mother replied, "DON'T WORRY I'M MAKING SOME!"
The son's voice followed, "I'M ADDING EXTRA CHEESE!"
What is a cannibal's favorite place to go? An orphanage. What are they gonna do, tell their parents?