They jokes
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
Because they can never find home.
How are gay people like mice?
They both hate pussies.
Why are women’s feet so small?
So they can stand closer to the sink.
What do slinkies and the handicapped have in common?
They are the most fun when pushed down a flight of stairs.
Joe: What do the Leafs and the Titanic have in common?
Ben: I don't know.
Joe: They both look good until they hit the ice.
Memes
What is the difference between an orphan and a deaf kid?
They can't hear or speak to their parents that never came back.
How did the British lose the War of 1812?
They were out-Britshed.
Why did the orphan cross the road? They thought they saw their mother.
Did you know Princess Diana had dandruff?
Yea, they found her “head and shoulders“ on the backseat of her car.
Q: Why are the 49ers called the 49ers?
A: 'Cause they can't make it past the 50-yard line.
Why should you never give an orphan a phone?
Because they wouldn't be able to find the home button.
What’s Michael Jackson’s favorite holiday? 4th of July when they set off fireworks.
Some people think jokes about child abuse are funny.
I'm not sure if I think that, but they do seem to hit different.
Your hairline is so long that when you finally found the length of it, you told someone and they said, "Don't give me your phone number."
Why is a bee's hair so smooth and sticky?
Because they use honeycombs.
They call me Mr. Distracted, truly a spastic. Can't talk to my folks cause they say I'm pro- problematic. Really fantastic. Can't focus unless I take meds then it's magic. My brain is like traffic, always fucking active. But never at the right time, pretty fucking tragic it happens.
*WARNING* THIS WILL NEVER GET OUT OF YOUR HEAD - READ IF YOU DARE.....
What came first? The chicken or the egg?
Which came first? The color orange or the fruit?
Who taught the first ever teacher?
If you expect the unexpected, doesn't that make the unexpected expected?
If you describe something as 'indescribable', then haven't you already described it?
In the word 'scent', is the silent letter the 's' or the 'ce'?
Why do your lips touch when they say the word 'separate', but don't touch when you say the word 'together'?
How many photos do you think you could be in the background of?
The guy who discovered cow milk, what was he doing with that cow?
Do regular dogs see police dogs and think, "Oh no, it's a cop"?
Is it possible to cry underwater?
If two left handers have an argument, who is right?
I warned you!! You just didn't listen.... :O
Hey you, the person who's scrolling, I know you might have depression and some feel they can't talk to anyone about it, so in the comments please, if you need to talk to others, if you comment about it and say you need to talk to someone, I promise you that I will talk to you. You are not alone, and even though it seems it won't change and get better, it will, I promise.
Please no harsh comments toward each other.
How do you know America's bad at chess?
They lost 2 towers!
They say nothing is impossible, but I've been doing nothing all day.