They jokes

The mother and her daughter went to the store. After they arrived, the daughter looked around and ran off somewhere. The mother realized this and took off looking for her. After a while, she found her tugging on a black man. The mother asked, "What are you doing?" and the daughter replied, "I wan't the chocolate!"

I was working at a check-in station for a flight to Riyadh when suddenly I was approached by Benzema, Kante, and Neymar!

At first I was very surprised and curious, so I asked them why they decided to play in the Saudi Pro League and not MLS where GOAT Messi plays. They all smiled and happily replied: "Don't you know, the legendary bench warmer PRISTIANO PENALDO plays there!"

Now I fully understood what they meant! They know that Pristiano is already finished, so winning trophies will be easy for them. I smiled and happily let them through.

Me: Want to hear a joke?

Friend: Sure.

Me: When my Mum and Dad said they loved me.

Friend: What's funny about that?

Me: Because the next day they disowned me.

Why do ducks have feathers? So they can cover their butt quacks.

Some people think jokes about child abuse are funny.

I'm not sure if I think that, but they do seem to hit different.

If a Jewish kid has ADHD, do they get sent to a concentration camp?

What do slinkies and the handicapped have in common?

They are the most fun when pushed down a flight of stairs.

What is the difference between an orphan and a deaf kid?

They can't hear or speak to their parents that never came back.

How are gay people like mice?

They both hate pussies.

Why are women’s feet so small?

So they can stand closer to the sink.

Why is Afghanistan good at chess? They take the rooks out fast.

What is the biggest fear of an American soldier taking a piss in a bush during the Vietnam war? His manhood will be chopped off.

Joe: What do the Leafs and the Titanic have in common?

Ben: I don't know.

Joe: They both look good until they hit the ice.

Why should you never give an orphan a phone?

Because they wouldn't be able to find the home button.

What animal can jump the highest?

Emo kids because once they go up they never come back.

Your hairline is so long that when you finally found the length of it, you told someone and they said, "Don't give me your phone number."

I love telling jokes about orphans. What are they gonna do, tell their parents?

Why do orphans eat an ice cream cone?? They can't afford a family pack.

I love telling jokes about orphans. I mean, what are they going to do about it? Tell their parents?

What do a baby and a grenade have in common? They both make loud noises when thrown.

I went to Starbucks today and they asked what I wanted, and I replied with "to die, a shot of bleach, and an deppresso expresso."