They say watching child porn will get me 20 years in jail. I prefer to think of it as two 10-year-olds.
They Jokes
Kobe Bryant and 9/11 are two things I don't joke about because when I do, they tend to crash and burn.
What does a priest and a clown have in common?
They both make children cry.
Q: Why can orphans swim?
A: They have or-fins.
Q: What does Abraham Lincoln have in common with a poor quality pirated movie?
A: They were both shot in a theater.
Me listening to some random lgbtq protester say Its racist to ask somebody if they want free fried chicken
đ¤ â How do lesbians đł practice safe đ sex they put condoms on dildos and then they put dildos inside of their đ đ đ mouths and then they perform fellatio on them
Why are orphans so skinny?
They never eat anything that is family size.
What do McDonald's and a priest have in common? They both put their meat in 10 year old buns.
There's a lot of talk about starting families, but no one ever talks about finishing what they started.
People keep telling me they hope Kenny never has kids.
I don't think that's a worry. His mom is much too old to get pregnant.
Would you like to eat some African food?
So would they...
Why did the orphan rob the bank?
So they could be wanted.
Whatâs the difference between a retard and a zombie? Nothing much, they both dribble, moan, are hungry, walk weirdly, and it takes a bullet in the head to put them both down.
I was walking down Main Street when I saw a child.
I told him, "I will give you 20$ if you get my balls back from the vet."
He replied, "Why did they take your balls sir?"
"Beer plus going to the vet does not work well for everybody, especially when you're a furry."
What do an angler fish and a pedophile have in common?
They both like to hide in dark places, look creepy, and like to lure small creatures.
Why do orphans go to church on family day? cuz they get to spend time with their father.
Why can't Chinese play baseball?
Because they eat the bats.
What do trans men and Pinocchio have in common?
Both are lying when they say "I'm a real boy."
(I'm a trans man myself lol)
Why can't dinosaurs talk?
Because they are all dead.
I was cooking eggs the other day. It was very egg-citing, although, I was exaggerating, but, if you think that wasnât funny to you, then youâre hard-boiled. Thatâs all for today, yolks! So I said before several cats starting fighting, that sh*t was a catastrophe. These kittens were all like âYouâve gotta be kitten me.â Meanwhile, in the ocean, they just waved, see what I did there? You shore you didnât? Oh, alright, thatâs okay bud- I guess these ocean puns are too deep for you. No? Okay- but, you know why the skeleton was lonely, eh? Oh, cause he had no body. Why didnât the skeleton ask the girl out? He didnât have the guts. What did the skeleton do to his gf? He boned her. No? Alright. Those didnât make you laugh? Maybe I should hit your funny bone.
